Herculodge

Can the Terrible Twos Start at 18 Months?

The twins Julia and Natalie are very sweet and happy around 6:30 AM when this photo was taken, but as the day goes on they can become some rather tumultuous ripsnorters. At 18 months, can they already be in the Terrible Two Stage?

Why You Should be a Shamed Parent #1: You're Using Wonder Pets As a Verb

When my twin toddlers Natalie and Julia get fussy, so loud I can't hear anything else, the default solution is to turn on Wonder Pets. I have 20 episodes recorded on DVR. It's gotten to the point that I'm using Wonder Pets as a verb and will say to my wife, Carrie, "Hey, should I WP the babies?" like I"m getting out a can of Fuss be Gone. 

Surely, I have overused WP to soothe the fuss levels and this is evidence that I am going to Parents Hell for the shamed. 

Day 3 of Natalie's Croup Renders Her Sleepless and Melancholy

Natalie's twin sister Julia had croup about 12 days ago.

Now Natalie has joined the party. Her dry coughs frighten and pain her. What is a croup cough like? Imagine slamming the brakes of a Mack truck with no brake pads.

Between 9PM and 12:30 A.M. it's a major fuss fest and she does not wake refreshed to say the least.

The good news: She didn't need to go the ER like her sister. The bad news. When will this end?

Twin Daughters Equals Twin Cases of Croup

 

Julia (above) had croup about 11 days ago. She had to go to the ER and is fine now. Yesterday her sister Natalie (below) showed symptoms for it. So far Natalie's case isn't as extreme and she hasn't had to go to the hospital.

Here's a question: Can Natalie re-infect Julia with croup?

 

Julia Released from the Hospital After a Bad Case of Croup

Natalie has been anxious all day wondering what happened to her twin sister, Julia (above right). I just got the call from the hospital. Julia got released after almost 24 hours.

The doctor says we should have a cold air humidifier in case this happens again. Hot steam makes the condition worse. 

Croup Sends My Daughter Julia to the Emergency Room

Last night my 15-month-old daughter Julia woke up around 9 P.M. crying and coughing like a rasping seal. She was hunched over in her crib fighting for breath. Our pediatrician, on the emergency phone line, instructed us to put Julia next to a hot shower. If her condition didn't improve, send her to the nearest emergency room.

Ten minutes later as her breathing worsened, my wife Carrie took Julia to Little Company of Mary while I stayed with Julia's twin sister Natalie.

Carrie called me this morning, around 5 A.M., to tell me Julia is fine but will need treatment for 48 hours because in part she may have asthma. 

I never knew what croup was before. Now I do. 

Must Get the Girls Started on Power Yoga Sooner Than Later

Natalie has shown an athletic proclivity since about 4 months. Ten months later, she may be ready for power yoga. 

Surviving the Day After Halloween: Give Your Kids' Candy to the Sweets Fairy

So it's the day after Halloween and your kids have enough candy to cause a hypoglycemic explosion in their pancreas. What to do you do? You have them give it to the Sweets Fairy in return for a special gift for more appealing than candy.

In my case, I will give my daughters a 5-pound canister of whey protein powder, chocolate most likely, to pour over their oatmeal. I can hear them now:

"Thanks, Daddy, for the protein powder. You're the best dad ever."

What It Means to be a Man While Working the Skeleton Shift with My Twin Daughters

 

My twin daughters, Julia and Natalie, are approaching 7 months and as my wife and I do staggered baby shifts and I’m alone with my girls for six hours in the morning, I find myself whining too much about the difficulty of raising my twins ("I'm 48 years old and going through the meat grinder with these fuss monsters!"), a violation of the Man Points I claim to esteem.

So it’s time for some perspicacious, unflinching self-scrutiny. I am no stranger to hard work. For decades I burned over 1,300 calories in a hour doing some kind of cardio or other. The rigor of my training was exhausting, so why complain now?

Because the energy of my training was directed toward me. The manly challenge I have now is to apply the discipline and rigor toward the care of my daughters. Now that’s manly. 

 

Walking My Twin Babies in the Stroller Requires a Certain Stagecraft and I Failed Miserably

I find that walking my twin girls in my stroller everyday, with my Sangean DT-400 and earbuds, for an hour or so, I meet a lot of well-wishing people, who assume a certain sweetness about myself since fatherhood suggests, among other things, cheerful benevolence, an important trait for fatherhood. 

Let's just say I failed to maintain this image a few days ago. I was listening to KPCC's Larry Mantle talk to an LA Times reporter about the possible demise of Los Angeles' public TV station KCET (donations down, cost of PBS programming way up), when a lady caller, whose crackling voice made her sound like she was in her 80s, claimed that KCET was the only TV station she watched. I thought that this was precisely KCET's problem, a dying audience, and I spoke out loud in a loud voice, "Yeah, but you're super old, dead, part of a dying generation." 

I looked out of the corner of my eye and saw an old man standing with his boxer by his front yard. The man's jaw had dropped and his gray eye brows wilted. It was clear he had assumed my vociferous rant was directed toward him. Of course, it was not. I was talking to myself while listening to the radio, but I knew that the old man thought I had railed into him. 

It was too late for me to explain. I just kept walking, knowing my baby-walking stagecraft had failed miserably.