One. Lexicon
1. prison dilemma: extreme deprivation, designed to protect and punish, results in more craziness, which results in more danger: See page 420, top paragraph. And see 420, bottom paragraph
2. Insane running asylum: See page 426, third paragraph.
3. Prison paradox: prisoners are helpless and brutalized on one hand; on the other hand, powerful prisoners, heads of gangs, operate their crimes more efficiently in prison than they do outside of prison and often they boss around the prison guards.
4. One-size-fits-all fallacy, procrustean: See page 421
5. Economic waste: 422 top
6. Counterargument structure: See 421, 422
7. Chicken or the egg 423
8. Recidivism:
Qualities of Successful Thesis:
1. One sentence that establishes a demonstrable argument or purpose.
2. Demonstrable means two things: writer has authentic emotional connection to material so he or she doesn’t run out of gas at the midway point. Secondly, it means writer can support the thesis with mapping statements. Sample: The popularity of SUVs reveals a malignancy about American consumerism. First, SUV makers market their vehicles toward people who wish to dominate and bully on the road; second, SUV drivers feel entitled to cheap gas to quench their driving habits, at the expense of American dependency on oil from hostile countries; third, SUV drivers often recklessly multi-task as they live inside their little cockpit fantasy. Lipstick, DVD, Carl’s Jr. gluttony, cell phone, etc.
3. A good thesis defies the obvious and possesses the So-What Factor: Sample: Tom Cruise and Terrell Owens are jerks. A better thesis: Society requires grotesque celebrities, such as Tom Cruise and Terrell Owens, to be our punching bags. First, these vile celebrities refute the unhealthy notion that riches result in goodness; second, our communal hatred for them gives us a sense of shared values; third, our loathing for these miscreants gives us catharsis and we vent our class envy and middle class frustrations.
4. A good thesis answers a compelling question. Why does no one care about Barry Bonds, even as he closes in on Hank Aaron’s record? In the wake of Hurricane Katrina, how did the US government leave so many people to die in a country that is the richest and freest in the world? Why do women continue to outnumber men in college enrollment? Patience, fortitude, humility, pride, long-term vision. What is it?
Another compelling question: Why do Americans spend more and more money on diets and workout programs and personal trainers as they continue to getter fatter and fatter and fatter and fatter?: Americans grow obscenely fatter in the face of their diet obsessions because none of their “programs” address the root of their fatness. To the contrary, their dieting exacerbates their real problem, which is that they are blind, incorrigible consumers. The diet is just another consumer commodity that promises a “magic bullet.” The diet is, like their overeating, a form of obsessive neurosis and orality. Finally, the diet becomes a form of shared communal experience that gives them a feeble sense of belonging and assuages their loneliness. Their laziness compels them to seek magic bullets rather than change behavior and get educated. Their diet obsession intensifies their food obsession. Their diet becomes a feeble way to stave off their loneliness.
Weak thesis is too broad and obvious:
Katy Vine’s essay shows that addiction is growing in the Internet Age.
Katy Vine’s essay is about a bunch of computer nerds who get more stupid when they hang out together.
Improved thesis is more specific, demonstrable, and analytical
Katy Vine’s essay shows us the devious nature of addiction in the Internet Age, which renders addicts helpless because technology creeps up on us incrementally, it is ubiquitous and easy to access, it is associated with intelligence and success, and it creates a world that buffers us from “reality checks.” (Cause and effect essay)
Weak thesis statements for option 2:
“AWOL in America” is about how the military takes advantage of young, naïve people.
“AWOL in America is about how we should be more lenient with deserters.
Weak thesis statements for option 3
“Return of the Madhouse” is about the abuses in prison.
“Return of the Madhouse” makes us question the harsh conditions of the supermax.
A thesis that rejects Abramsky:
While Abramsky makes a solid and noble case for removing prison abuses, her lack of “real life” experience contributes to a rather naïve argument for a more humanitarian prison approach, which ignores the near impossibility of ferreting real psychos from fakers, compromises guard safety for prisoner freedoms, blue-printing an improved prison model for which there is an egregious lack of funds.
A thesis that supports Abramsky:
While Abramsky’s refutation of the supermax system reveals some serious flaws, her argument for reform must be embraced with great urgency for failure to do so will only endanger prison guards, exacerbate criminal behavior, set the stage for gross prison abuses and mismanagement, and in the long-term pose a greater threat to the security of our society.
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