Office H121P; Phone Extension: 5673
Office Hours: Mon and Wed: 2:30-3:45; Tues and Thurs: 12:15-1 and 3:30-4:15
Email: [email protected]
Course Catalog Description:
This course is designed to strengthen the students’ ability to read with understanding and discernment, to discuss assigned readings intelligently, and to write clearly. Emphasis will be on writing essays in which each paragraph relates to a controlling idea, has an introduction and a conclusion, and contains primary and secondary support. College-level reading material will be assigned to provide the stimulus for class discussion and writing assignments, including a required research paper.
Course Objectives:
One. Recognize and revise sentence-level grammar and usage errors.
Two. Read and apply critical-thinking skills to numerous published articles and to college-level, book-length works for the purpose of writing and discussion.
Three. Apply appropriate strategies in the writing process including prewriting, composing, revising, and editing techniques.
Four. Compose multi-paragraph, thesis-driven essays with logical and appropriate supporting ideas, and with unity and coherence.
Five. Demonstrate ability to locate and utilize a variety of academic databases, peer-reviewed journals, and scholarly websites.
Six. Utilize MLA guidelines to format essays, cite sources in the texts of essays, and compile Works Cited lists.
Student Learning Outcomes:
Upon completion of this course, students will:
- Complete a research-based essay that has been written out of class and undergone revision. It should demonstrate the student’s ability to thoughtfully support a single thesis using analysis and synthesis.
- Integrate multiple sources, including a book-length work and a variety of academic databases, peer-reviewed journals, and scholarly websites. Citations must be in MLA format and include a Works Cited page.
- Demonstrate logical paragraph composition and sentence structure. The essay should have correct grammar, spelling, and word use.
Students with Disabilities:
It is the policy of the El Camino Community College District to encourage full inclusion of people with disabilities in all programs and services. Students with disabilities who believe they may need accommodations in this class should contact the campus Special Resource Center (310) 660-3295, as soon as possible. This will ensure that students are able to fully participate.
Academic Honesty and Plagiarism:
El Camino College places a high value on the integrity of its student scholars. When an instructor determines that there is evidence of dishonesty in any academic work (including, but not limited to cheating, plagiarism, or theft of exam materials), disciplinary action appropriate to the misconduct as defined in BP 5500 may be taken. A failing grade on an assignment in which academic dishonesty has occurred and suspension from class are among the disciplinary actions for academic dishonesty (AP 5520). Students with any questions about the Academic Honesty or discipline policies are encouraged to speak with their instructor in advance.
Attendance Policy: Students are expected to attend their classes regularly. Students who miss the first class meeting or who are not in regular attendance during the add period for the class may be dropped by the instructor. Students whose absences from a class exceed 10% of the scheduled class meeting times may be dropped by the instructor. However, students are responsible for dropping a class within the deadlines published in the class schedule. Students who stop attending but do not drop may receive a failing grade.
Student Resources:
- Reading Success Center (East Library Basement E-36)
Software and tutors are available for vocabulary development & reading comprehension. - Library Media Technology Center - LMTC (East Library Basement)
Computers are available for free use. Bring your student ID # & flash drive. There’s a charge for printing. - Writing Center (H122)
Computers are available for free use. Free tutoring is available for writing assignments, grammar, and vocabulary. Bring your student ID & flash drive to save work. Printing is NOT available. - Learning Resource Center - LRC (West Wing of the Library, 2nd floor)
The LRC Tutorial Program offers free drop-in tutoring. For the tutoring schedule, go to www.elcamino.edu/library/lrc/tutoring .The LRC also offers individualized computer adaptive programs to help build your reading comprehension skills. - Student Health Center (Next to the Pool)
The Health Center offers free medical and psychological services as well as free workshops on topics like “test anxiety.” Low cost medical testing is also available. - Special Resource Center – SRC (Southwest Wing of Student Services Building)
The SRC provides free disability services, including interpreters, testing accommodations, counseling, and adaptive computer technology.
Books and Materials You Need to Buy for This Class
Cooked by Jeff Henderson
Acting Out Culture, 3rd Edition, edited by James Miller
Rules for Writers, 8th Edition by Diana Hacker
2 Blue Books for in-class writing exams
Total Words Written in Semester: 8,000; Total Points: 1,000
One. First four 1,400-word essays are 150 points each.
Two. Final Capstone Essay: 1,400-word essay is 200 points.
Three. The final essay, Number 5, is 200 points and needs a completed typed draft for peer edit due the class before the final draft is due. This completed draft must be completed on Peer Edit day or student loses 20 points on Final Capstone essay.
Four. In-Class Reading Exams are 500 words for 100 points each.
Total Points: 1,000 (A is 900-100; B is 800-899; C is 700-799; D is 600 to 699)
Essay #1 Options with 3 sources Due 9/18
One. Apply the wisdom of Arthur C. Brooks’ essay “Love People, Not Pleasure” to develop a thesis that analyzes the personal transformation of Jeff Henderson rendered in his memoir Cooked.
Suggested Outline:
Paragraph 1: Summarize Brooks’ essay in 250 words.
Paragraph 2: Summarize Henderson’s memoir in 250 words.
Paragraph 3: Your thesis that shows how Henderson’s transformation illustrated Brooks’ ideas: 150 words. (650 subtotal)
Paragraphs 4-8 will support your thesis with 150 words each for 750 words and 1,400 subtotal.
Paragraph 9, your conclusion, will restate your thesis in dramatic form.
Two. A wise man once said that when we think we're rising in life, we're really falling and when we think we're falling, we're really rising. In a 6-page essay, apply this wisdom, in all of its psychological complexity, to Jeff Henderson's journey and compare to someone from a personal interview. Use blog, book, and personal interview for your sixth page, your Works Cited page.
Suggested Outline:
Paragraph 1: Write a narrative of someone who thought he or she was rising but was actually falling in 200 words.
Paragraph 2: Summarize Henderson’s memoir in 200 words.
Paragraph 3: Your thesis analyzes how Henderson’s memoir is an illustration of the wise man’s adage with 5 mapping components. 150 words, 550 subtotal.
Paragraphs 4-8 will support your thesis with 150 words for 750 words and 1,300 subtotal.
Conclusion, a dramatic restatement of your thesis for 100 words for 1,400 words.
Essay #2 Options with 3 Sources for Works Cited Due 10/9
One. In an essay of appropriate length, defend, refute, or complicate Cal Newport’s argument from his book excerpt (available online) from So Good They Can't Ignore You that the Passion Hypothesis is dangerous and should be replaced by the craftsman mindset.
Use 3 sources for your Works Cited page.
Suggested Essay Structure:
Paragraph 1: Summarize Newport's argument in 250 words.
Paragraph 2: Explain how you've been pursuing your career goals before reading Newport's book. Then explain how his book affects the way you might re-think your strategy and approach to your career plans. 250 words.
Paragraph 3: Your thesis: Example: "Cal Newport's argument that should should shun the Passion Hypothesis and replace it with a craftsman's mindset is convincing (is not convincing) because ______________, ______________, _________________, and ______________________. 150 words (subtotal 650 words)
Paragraphs 4-7 are your supporting paragraphs (150 each for 600; subtotal is 1,250)
Paragraph 8: Counterargument-Rebuttal Paragraph in which you anticipate how your opponents will oppose your thesis and your rebuttal to their counterargument. (150 words for subtotal of 1,400 words)
Paragraph 9: Conclusion: Dramatic reiteration of your thesis. (100 words for grand total of 1,500 words).
Two. Sherry Turkle’s “The Flight from Conversation” and Curtis Silver’s “The Quagmire of Social Media Friendships” (444) allege certain pathologies result from social media. These pathologies include an empathy deficit, depression, narcissism, shortened attention span, online shaming, lost conversation skills, and even altered brain development. In an argumentative essay, support, refute, or complicate the assertion from Sherry Turkle’s “The Flight from Conversation” (online essay) that social media is harmful for our social, cultural and intellectual development.
Sample Outline
Paragraph 1 Summarize the pathologies explained in Turkle's and Silver's essays.
Paragraph 2: Write a profile of a person you know who is squandering his or life on social media while becoming afflicted with a myriad of social pathologies.
Paragraph 3: Write an argumentative thesis that either attributes these pathologies to social media, as is claimed in Turkle's essay, or argue that social media is not the culprit.
Paragraphs 4-7: Support your thesis with these body paragraphs.
Paragraph 8: Anticipate how your opponents would disagree with you (counterargument) and show why your opponents are wrong (rebuttal).
Typical counterargument goes like this: "My opponents claim that I am wrong because of _________; however, their claim fails to address ___________." Or, "My opponents will take issue with __________; however, their opposition is clearly misguided when we consider _______________."
Paragraph 9: Conclusion, a restatement of your thesis with powerful emotion (pathos).
Essay #3 Options with 3 Sources Due 10/30
One. Refute, support, or complicate Asma’s assertion that green guilt is not only a relative to religious guilt but speaks to our drive to sacrifice self-indulgence for the drive of altruistic self-preservation and social reciprocity.
Two. Develop a thesis that supports, refutes, or complicates the assertion Debra J. Dickerson, who wrote the “The Great White Way,” would find Michael Eric Dyson's essay "Understanding Black Patriotism" a complement to Dickerson's ideas about race, power, and hierarchy.
Three. Support, refute, or complicate Debra J. Dickerson's argument that race in America is more of a social fantasy than a reflection of objective reality.
Four. Show how the Jordan Peele movie Get Out builds on Debra J. Dickerson's argument that race in America is a cruel invention designed to create a hierarchy of power, one that can be seen in all its horror in post-Obama America. For sources, see NYT review , The Guardian review, and the Variety review.
Five. Develop a thesis that analyzes the human inclination for staying within the tribe of sameness as explained in David Brooks’ “People Like Us” (very popular with students).
Six. Support, refute, or complicate Nicholas Kristof’s assertion that slashing food stamps is morally indefensible.
Seven. Addressing at least one essay we've covered in class (“The Wages of Sin” and “Eat Cake, Subtract Self-Esteem), support, refute, or complicate the argument that overeating, anorexia, and other eating disorders are not the result of a disease but are habits of individual circumstance and economics.
Eight. Support, refute, or complicate the argument that feminist-political explanations for anorexia, as evident in Caroline Knapp's essay, are a ruse that hide the disease's real causes.
Nine. In the context of “Our Baby, Her Womb,” support, defend, or complicate the argument that surrogate motherhood is a moral abomination.
Essay #4 Options with 3 Sources for Works Cited Due 11-20
One. Support, defend, or complicate the assertion that the unstoppable presence of trolls on Twitter has made being on Twitter, for many, an exercise so embedded in futility that deleting one's Twitter account is probably the best option. Consult Lindy West's "I've Left Twitter," Joel Stein's "How Trolls Are Ruining the Internet," Kathy Sierra's "Why the Trolls Will Always Win," Andrew Marantz's and "The Shameful Trolling of Leslie Jones." You can also consult the online essay “The Unsafety Net.”
Two. In the context of “The Flip Side of the Internet” and “The Evolution of Shaming,” develop a cause and effect thesis about the frenzy of shame that is evident in the age of social media.
Three. Comparing “Faces in the Mirror” and “The Flip Side of the Internet,” develop a thesis that analyzes the confluence of narcissism and celebrity worship.
Four. In the context of “Unspeakable Conversations,” defend, refute, or complicate Peter Singer’s position that there are moral grounds for infanticide or “mercy killings.”
Five. Develop a thesis that defends, refutes, or complicates Paul Bloom’s assertion that simple-minded notions of empathy are actually dangerous and diminish us as human beings.
Six. Develop a thesis that defends, refutes, or complicates the argument that the NFL is a moral abomination that must be boycotted.
Seven. Develop a thesis that defends, refutes, or complicates the argument that mass incarceration is “The New Jim Crow.”
Essay #5 Options: Capstone Essay with 5 Sources for Works Cited Due 12/11.
One. Support, refute, or complicate Alfie Kohn’s assertion from “Degrading to De-grading” that grading is an inferior education tool that all conscientious teachers should abandon.
Two. Support, refute, or complicate the inferred lesson from bell hooks’ essay, “Learning in the Shadow of Race and Class” that upward mobility requires a betrayal of one’s economic class and even family.
Three. In the context of one or more essays we’ve read about standardized testing, support, refute, or complicate the assertion that standardized testing is a money-making canard sodden with incompetence, corruption, and moral bankruptcy, and therefore must be abolished.
Four. Support, refute, or complicate the argument that “Against School” and any other essays we’ve covered persuasively evidence that American education is more about protecting private business interests, maintaining class bias, and asserting mass control than it is about promoting real empowerment such as critical thinking, independence, and freedom.
Five. In the context of John Taylor Gatto’s “Against School,” support, refute, or complicate the argument that that American education is more about protecting private business interests, maintaining class bias, and asserting mass control than it is about promoting real empowerment such as critical thinking, independence, and freedom.
Six. Bell Hooks sees the self-destruction from extreme self-abasement on one hand and extreme privilege on the other. She is on a quest for a healthy middle ground. These components of toxic self-abasement and toxic privilege, and the sick symbiotic relationship between the rich and poor, are evident in Hooks' essay, "Learning in the Shadow of Race and Class" (287). Toxic abasement and the sick symbiotic relationship between the rich and the poor are also evident in "The Consequences--Undoing Sanity" (342), "How the Poor Are Made to Pay for Their Poverty," and Linda Tirado's online essay "Why I Make Terrible Decisions." Develop a thesis that compares the toxic symbiotic relationship between the rich and the poor in the aforementioned essays and show that human redemption is from a sense of healthy, well-balanced privilege that doesn't exclude social conscience. (This prompt has the thesis embedded in it.)
Seven. Addressing Cathy Young's online essay "Linda Tirado's Poverty Tale: Not Quite Fake, Far from Accurate," develop an argumentative thesis that addresses the charge that Tirado is guilty of committing a "poverty hoax."
Your guidelines for your Final Research Paper are as follows:
This research paper should present a thesis that is specific, manageable, provable, and contestable—in other words, the thesis should offer a clear position, stand, or opinion that will be proven with research.
You should analyze and prove your thesis using examples and quotes from a variety of sources.
You need to research and cite from at least five sources. You must use at least 3 different types of sources.
At least one source must be from an ECC library database.
At least one source must be a book, anthology or textbook.
At least one source must be from a credible website, appropriate for academic use.
The paper should not over-rely on one main source for most of the information. Rather, it should use multiple sources and synthesize the information found in them.
This paper will be approximately 5-7 pages in length, not including the Works Cited page, which is also required. This means at least 5 full pages of text. The Works Cited page does NOT count towards length requirement.
You must use MLA format for the document, in-text citations, and Works Cited page.
You must integrate quotations and paraphrases using signal phrases and analysis or commentary.
You must sustain your argument, use transitions effectively, and use correct grammar, spelling, and punctuation.
Your paper must be logically organized and focused.
Late papers reduced a full grade. No late papers accepted a week past due date.
Peer Edit
You must do a peer edit. You must show up to class on peer edit day with a completed typed draft for 20 points.
You Can’t “Ride” the Class
If you’re “riding” the class, that is missing more than 10% of classes and not keeping up with assignments, you can’t fulfill the Student Learning Outcomes, and you will be dropped.
You Must Use turnitin to submit essay and bring hard copy on due date
Each essay must be submitted to www.turnitin.com where it will be checked for illegal copying/plagiarism. I cannot give credit for an essay that is not submitted to this site by the deadline.
The process is very simple; if you need help, detailed instructions are available at http://turnitin.com/en_us/training/student-training/student-quickstart-guide
You will need two pieces of information to use the site:
Class ID and Enrollment Password, which I will give you first week of class
Classroom Decorum: No smart phones can be used in class. If you’re on your smart phone and I see you, you get a warning the first time. Second time, you must leave the class and lose 25 points. Third time, you must leave the class and lose 50 points. The above also applies to talking and doing homework from other classes.
Tardies: It’s reasonable to be late a couple of times a semester, but some students consistently show up late to class, and this distraction compromises the learning environment significantly. Therefore, starting on the fourth tardy, 50 points must be deducted from total grade and another 25 points must be deducted for every tardy after that.
Reading and Writing Schedule
August 28 Introduction; syllabus, writing assignments, grading rubric
August 30 Cooked 1-50; comma splices
September 4 Holiday
September 6 Cooked 51-100; signal phrases, sentence fragments
September 11 Cooked 101-end; parallelism
September 13 In-Class Blue Book Essay Exam #1 for 100 points
September 18 Cooked Essay #1 Due; Cal Newport So Good They Can’t Ignore You
September 20 Can Newport continued; dangling modifiers
September 25 “Flight from Conversation”; writing introductions
September 27 "Quagmire of Social Media Relationships" 444 and "Exploring Facebook Depression"
October 2 "Is Facebook Making Us Lonely?", "Facebook Isn't Making Us Lonely," "How Facebook Makes Us Unhappy"
October 4 ; "I, Narcissist--Vanity, Social Media, and the Human Condition"; signal phrase review
October 9 Essay 2 Due; “Green Guilt” (25); sentence variety
October 11 “The Great White Way” (68); “Understanding Black Patriotism (52)
October 16 “People Like Us” (62)
October 18 “Prudence or Cruelty” (172); counterargument templates
October 23 “The Wages of Sin” (181), “Add Cake, Subtract Self-Esteem” (188)
October 25 “Our Baby, Her Womb” (418)
October 30 Essay 3 Due; Should We Delete Our Twitter Accounts?
November 1 “The Faces in the Mirror” (31), “The Flip Side of Internet Fame” (90)
November 6 “Unspeakable Conversations” (96)
November 8 Online essays about empathy and boycotting the NFL
November 13 Online essays about reparations debate
November 15 Online essays about mass incarceration and “The New Jim Crow,” including “The Caging of America”
November 20 Essay 4 Due; “From Degrading to De-Grading” (238)
November 22 “Learning in the Shadow of Race and Class” (287), “Against School” (271)
November 27 “Everything You’ve Heard About Failing Schools Is Wrong” (252), online essay "Why Poor Schools Can't Win at Standardized Testing"; John Oliver video
November 29 “The Consequences—Undoing Sanity” (342), “Fifteen Years on the Bottom Rung” (353), online essay: Linda Tirado's "This Is Why Poor People's Bad Decisions Make Perfect Sense"; Cathy Young's "Linda Tirado's Poverty Tale: Not Quite Fake, Far from Accurate"
December 4 “How the Poor Are Made to Pay for Their Poverty,” write preliminary thesis in class
December 6 Peer Edit: Bring your typed completed first draft to class.
December 11 Essay 5 Due; Blue Book Exam Part 1
December 12 Blue Book Exam Part 2
Essay #1: Based on Cooked by Jeff Henderson
Choose one of the Following
Choice A
Apply the wisdom of Arthur C. Brooks’ essay “Love People, Not Pleasure” to develop a thesis that analyzes the personal transformation of Jeff Henderson rendered in his memoir Cooked.
Suggested Outline:
Paragraph 1: Summarize Brooks’ essay in 250 words.
Paragraph 2: Summarize Henderson’s memoir in 250 words.
Paragraph 3: Your thesis that shows how Henderson’s transformation illustrated Brooks’ ideas: 150 words. (650 subtotal)
Paragraphs 4-8 will support your thesis with 150 words each for 750 words and 1,400 subtotal.
Paragraph 9, your conclusion, will restate your thesis in dramatic form.
Choice B
A wise man once said that when we think we're rising in life, we're really falling and when we think we're falling, we're really rising. In a 6-page essay, apply this wisdom, in all of its psychological complexity, to Jeff Henderson's journey and compare to someone from a personal interview. Use blog, book, and personal interview for your sixth page, your Works Cited page.
You can use the same outline for Choice A for Choice B except for your first paragraph you will write a personal narrative of a time you thought you were rising when you were really falling and vice versa.
12 Things You Can Do To Increase Your Success in Freshman Composition
We read that in the latest study by the Institute for Higher Education, Leadership & Policy at Cal State Sacramento that only 30% of California community college students are transferring or getting their degrees. We have a real challenge in the community college if 70% are falling by the wayside.
My English 1A Class Over the Last 30 Years
About 45-50% of my students have dropped.
Some had health problems.
Some had transportation problems.
Some had family problems.
Some had relationship problems.
Some had job problems.
Some had housing problems.
Some had money problems.
But most students dropped for three major reasons.
One, they had terrible time management skills in which they were deluded into thinking their procrastination was adequate to make it through college.
Two, they were so underprepared in English writing and grammar that they become discouraged, despondent, and depressed. Their killed spirit made them back out of the fight.
Three, they were addicted to coming up with dubious excuses for not doing the work on time. They'd email me long-winded explanations of their troubles and seemed blind to the fact that the word count of their email excuses was far greater than the actual assignment. They seemed blind to the fact that BSing takes more work than just doing the work.
Here's the takeaway: When you BS others, you're not playing them; you're playing yourself.
Grammar Deficits = High Risk
There are several reasons for so many students being at risk for failing. Here's one:
At a recent meeting our Dean told us that 85% of the student body come to our college with severe grammar deficits.
Imagine the intimidation a new college student feels with severe grammar deficits and knowing that 70% of students will not transfer or get a degree.
It's like showing up to a jiu-jitsu tournament against blue belts and you know you only have a white belt.
From what I’ve observed in the classroom, here are 12 things you can do to improve your chances of succeeding in freshman composition that are analogous to martial arts training.
One. Shut off your cell phone.
At my girls' martial arts studio in Torrance, the students and parents cannot have their cell phones.
Nothing signals disrespect to the instructor and other students who show an unhealthy dependence on their phones.
I promise you college instructors notice students who are on their cell phones and appreciate students who are not.
The cell phone prevents you from being in the habit of focusing on one thing. Scattered attention and multitasking kill composition success.
Two. You need to not be ashamed for showing up to class without grammar skills. We all have to begin somewhere.
Your white belt isn’t just your skill level. It’s your maturity level. I went to college at 17. I was in remedial math and English. I dropped some classes. I received a letter warning me that if I didn’t improve my scholastic performance, I would be put on academic probation.
The letter did two things: Scared the hell out of me. The fear was an invaluable motivator.
The letter did a second thing to me: It injured my pride. My failings as a student had resulted in a day of reckoning. I was accountable for improving my performance or I’d suffer the humiliation of being suspended from college.
White belts like myself are going to suffer fear and humiliation. It’s part of the growing up process.
Three. You Need to Reinforce Classroom Instruction
When I studied jiu-jitsu with Jener Gracie 13 years ago, I noticed something. The once a week lesson was worthless unless I showed up several days a week to spar with other students. You have to reinforce the lesson with repetition.
Having a lesson from your instructor is not an end; it’s a beginning.
You can reinforce your instructors’ writing lessons by looking up the same exercises in other books, the Internet, and YouTube videos.
I’ve had students tell me I didn’t understand the math instructor’s calculus lesson, so I studied it on YouTube and now I get it.
Four. You Need to Feed Off Your Strength
When you go to the gym and lose fat and gain muscle, you feel more motivated to return to the gym. It becomes self-feeding.
When you study martial arts and climb the ladder and experience more confidence, you are more motivated to continue.
You have to experience the same sense of self-improvement in college to stay motivated.
Because my students struggle with grammar at an excessive level, they get very discouraged. Often, their grammar gets worse, not better, further into the semester.
I have to remind them that they are improving in certain areas: Writing signal phrases, finding credible research, organizing their essays, following a sound argument structure.
Grammar remains the Achilles heel, but I have to show their strengths with their weaknesses.
Five. You Learn Not to Let Your Weaknesses Overwhelm You
There are grammar books with 5,000 rules. If you try to play catch-up, you’ll be overwhelmed and quit. Find out 3-5 grammar and punctuation mistakes you’re consistently making and attack those 5 mistakes.
Your goal for the semester should be to eradicate those mistakes.
90 percent of my composition students make 3 mistakes over and over: sentence fragments, comma splices, and noun-pronoun agreement errors.
If you’re a white belt in jiu-jitsu, you can’t expect to learn all the moves in 16 weeks. You learn the basics: Passing the guard, escaping a headlock, making an arm lock, performing a rear choke hold.
Likewise, in grammar learn the 5 things you’re consistently having trouble with.
Six. You Need to Re-Condition Your Response to Failures and Setbacks
In Man’s Search for Meaning, Viktor Frankl teaches us that setbacks, conflict, loss, and suffering are inevitable.
Our overreactions or inappropriate actions to conflict become our enemy. In other words, we are own worst enemy.
As you struggle in a martial arts class, the sensei is not your enemy. You are at war with yourself.
In college, you become your number one impediment to progress.
When my daughters have tantrums, if I overreact with rage, their tantrums last longer. I simply compound the craziness. If I stay calm and composed, I can minimize their tantrums.
I’ve learned over the years to control my response to their tantrums, not because I’m mature, but because I’m selfish. It’s in my self-interest for them to get over their tantrum as soon as possible.
Seven. Get Rid of Energy Vampires from Your Life
The sensei wants his students to focus, which means excluding distractions or what I like to call Energy Vampires.
The one thing that impresses me when my girls are in the dojo is the silence. A lot of their exercises are done with mindful silence. That’s why there are no cell phones allowed, even in the lobby.
Go home and make a list of Energy Vampires:
Reading consumer reviews all day on the Internet. You could spend a whole day reading Amazon and other reviews of digital cameras. You could burn a day on the Internet easily.
Answering texts.
Answering social media messages.
You could burn a whole day texting and gossiping with friends.
Hanging out with associates from high school who are content with being 16 years
old for the rest of their lives.
Speaking of friends, some people you associate with from high school may not be on your college track. They may not be as mature as you. They may be in the Life Is a Big Party phase of their lives.
Most likely they’re Energy Vampires. You need to cut your ties from them. It may be cruel, but it’s the only way for you to survive.
The more Energy Vampires you identity and get rid from your life, the more you’ll be able to focus on the getting more knowledge, getting more independent, and getting more advanced in your climb up the educational ladder.
Eight. Learn That You Can’t Improve Your Skills Without Changing the Whole Person
In martial arts, the skills improve along with the person’s maturity. One doesn’t happen without the other. This is one reason martial arts are so popular with parents.
Often, your maturity will result in your losing some of your friends who didn’t mature. You may feel guilty for abandoning them, but you shouldn’t. They’ve made their choice.
One of my students wrote about this: A friend dropped out of college to work 3 jobs so he could make his BMW payments. He drove the BMW to the front of El Camino on Crenshaw and was screaming at his friends to look at his new car. My student said he and his friends had to rush to their English class and the BMW owner was all alone in the parking lot with no one to admire his new set of wheels.
Nine. You’re Not Alone in the Dark Woods. We start at the bottom.
We’re in this together. We work as a community. We’re interdependent on one another. We ask question. We’re fighting for the same end. We want you to have a higher belt so you can go to the next level. Your teacher is not your enemy or antagonist. Your teacher is your sensei who wants you to have the required skills to get a higher belt.
Ten. You Have to Show Up On Time Every Time: This speaks to accountability, respect, and dedication.
If you don’t show up or if you show up late, the sensei doesn’t want you there. There’s a long line of students who want to show up on time every time. The sensei doesn’t have time to waste.
I can tell you after 30 years of teaching there’s a huge difference in student performance between those who show up on time every day and those who don’t. Just the show of respect alone is huge. But this respect translates into higher performance, listening skills, and turning in assignments on time as well.
It would be nice if the community college were this Giant Martial Arts Studio. That’s not going to happen, but you can approach it like one and you’ll be all the stronger for it.
Eleven. If You’re Afraid of Taking a Writing Class, Embrace the Fear.
Fear can be a motivator. When I was 24 and working as a part-time English instructor, my high school buddies praised me, but I told them to quiet down. I was scared. I didn’t show great discipline. Fear compelled me to do what I had to do. I didn’t see any options other than finishing college.
I have a lot of fearful, anxious students who come up to me and say, “McMahon, I’m terrified. I don’t think I can do this.”
Usually these students do rather well.
It’s the calm students who sleep walk through class who fail.
Who would you rather be, the fearful student who does well, or the calm, zenned-out student who fails?
Twelve. Finish Your Essays Early and Read Them Aloud in Front of a Mirror.
I’ve taken surveys of my students. I will ask them who proofread their essay, and about 10 percent will raise their hand. The other 90 percent procrastinate, wait till the last minute, to rush an essay, and they wonder why they’re not improving. Einstein said insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.
Evaluating Sources
You must assess six things to determine if a source is worthy of being used for your research paper.
The author’s objectivity or fairness (author is not biased)
The author’s credibility (peer reviewed, read by experts)
The source’s relevance
The source’s currency (source is up-to-date)
The source’s comprehensiveness (source has sufficient depth)
The author’s authority (author’s credentials and experience render him or her an expert in the field)
Warning Signs of a Poor Online Source
Site has advertising
Some company or other sponsors site
A political organization or special interest group sponsors the site.
The site has many links to other biased sites.
Summarizing Sources
“A summary restates the main idea of a passage in concise terms”
A typical summary is one or two sentences.
A summary does not contain your opinions or analysis.
Paraphrasing Sources
A paraphrase, which is longer than a summary, contains more details and examples. Sometimes you need to be more specific than a summary to make sure your reader understands you.
A paraphrase does not include your opinions or analysis.
Quoting Sources
Quoting sources means you are quoting exactly what you are referring to in the text with no modifications, which might twist the author’s meaning.
You should avoid long quotations as much as possible.
Quote only when necessary. Rely on summary and paraphrase before resorting to direct quotes.
A good time to use a specific quote is when it’s an opposing point that you want to refute.
Using signal phrases to Introduce Summary, Paraphrase, and Quoted Material
Examples
According to Jeff McMahon, the grading rubric in English classes is used in such a way by instructors that soon there will be no such thing as an “easy” or “hard” professor. They’ll all be the same.
Jeff McMahon notes that the grading rubric in English classes is used in such a way by instructors that soon there will be no such thing as an “easy” or “hard” professor. They’ll all be the same.
The grading rubric in English classes is used in such a way by instructors, Jeff McMahon observes, that soon there will be no such thing as an “easy” or “hard” professor.
The grading rubric in English classes is used in such a way by instructors that soon there will be no such thing as an “easy” or “hard” professor, Jeff McMahon points out.
The story "Lime Pickle," referring to a spicy Indian condiment that makes the tongue dance with exotic pleasure, focuses on the conflict between a sweet, innocent young couple and debauched father whose introduction of the lime pickle becomes a metaphor for lost innocence. As we read, the narrator's girlfriend, upon realizing her father is an adulterous fop without morals, clings to her boyfriend in horror while watching her fond notions of family innocence "dissolve in some corrosive solution before her eyes." Of course, the lime pickle, that spicy, piquant temptress, is the corrosive Dionysian force that dissolves the nesting instinct that provides family stability. A lime pickle may be a tiny condiment, but beware of its powers, for as we say in Mexico, "Chiquito pero picoso."
Review the 4 Steps of MLA In-Text Citations
You need to do four things when you quote, paraphrase, or summarize from a text.
Step One: The first thing you need to do is introduce the material with a signal phrase. Use the templates:
Make sure to use a variety of signal phrases to introduce quotations and paraphrases.
Verbs in Signal Phrases
According to . . . (very common)
Ha Jin writes . . . (very common)
Panbin laments . . .
Dan rages . . .
Dan seethes . . .
Signal Phrase Templates
In the words of researchers Redelmeier and Tibshirani, “…”
As Matt Sundeen has noted, “…”
Patti Pena, mother of a child killed by a driver distracted by a cell phone, points out that “…”
“…” writes Christine Haughney, “…”
“…” claims wireless spokesperson Annette Jacobs.
Radio hosts Tom and Ray Magliozzi offer a persuasive counterargument: “…”
Step Two: The quote, paraphrase, or summary you use.
Step Three: The parenthetical citation, which comes after the cited material.
Kwon points out that the Fourth Amendment does not give employees any protections from employers’ “unreasonable searches and seizures” (6).
In the cultural website One-Way Street, Richard Prouty observes that Lasdun's "men exist in a fixed point of the universe, but they have no agency" (para. 7).
Step Four: Analyze your cited material. The analysis should be of a greater length than the cited material. Show how the cited material supports your thesis.
Writing Effective Introduction Paragraphs for Your Essays
Weak Introductions to Avoid
One. Don’t use overused quotes:
“We have nothing to fear but fear itself.”
“My fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country.”
“To be or not to be, that is the question.”
Two. Don’t use pretentious, grandiose, overwrought, bloated, self-regarding, clichéd, unintentionally funny openings:
Since the Dawn of Man, people have sought love and happiness . . .
In today’s society, we see more and more people cocooning in their homes . . .
Man has always wondered why happiness and contentment are so elusive like trying to grasp a bar of sudsy, wet soap.
We have now arrived at a Societal Epoch where we no longer truly communicate with one another as we have embarked upon the full-time task of self-aggrandizement through the social media of Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, et al.
In this modern world we face a new existential crisis with the advent of newfangled technologies rendering us razzle-dazzled with the overwhelming possibilities of digital splendor on one hand and painfully dislocated and lonely with our noses constantly rubbing our digital screens on the other.
Since Adam and Eve traipsed across the luxuriant Garden of Eden searching for the juicy, succulent Adriatic fig only to find it withered under the attack of mites, ants, and fruit flies, mankind has embarked upon the quest for the perfect pesticide.
Three. Never apologize to the reader:
Sorry for these half-baked chicken scratch thoughts. I didn’t get a lot of sleep last night and I didn’t have sufficient time to do the necessary research for the topic you assigned me.
I’m hardly an expert on this subject and I don’t know why anyone would take me seriously, but here it goes.
Forgive me but after over-indulging last night at HomeTown Buffet my brain has been rendered in a mindless fog and the ramblings of this essay prove to be rather incoherent.
Four. Don’t throw a thesis cream pie in your reader’s face.
In this essay I am going to prove to you why Americans will never buy those stupid automatic cars that don’t need a driver. The four supports that will support my thesis are ______________, ______________, _______________, and ________________.
It is my purpose in this essay to show you why I'm correct on the subject of the death penalty. My proofs will be _________, _______, _________, and ___________.
Five. Don’t use a dictionary definition (standard procedure for a sixth grade essay but not college in which you should use more sophisticated methods such as extended definition or expert definitions):
The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines metacognition as “awareness or analysis of one’s own learning or thinking process.”
General Principles of an Effective Introduction Paragraph
It piques your readers’ interest (often called a “hook”).
It is compelling.
It is timely.
It is relevant to the human condition and to your topic.
It transitions to your topic and/or thesis.
The Ten Types of Paragraph Introductions
One. Use a blunt statement of fact or insight that captures your readers’ attention:
It's good for us to have our feelings hurt.
You've never really lived until someone has handed you your __________ on a stick.
Men who are jealous are cheaters.
We would assume that jealous men are obsessed with fidelity, but in fact the most salient feature of the jealous man is that he is more often than not cheating on his partner. His jealousy results from projecting his own infidelities on his partner. He says to himself, “I am a cheater and therefore so is she.” We see this sick mentality in the character Dan from Ha Jin’s “The Beauty.” Trapped in his jealousy, Dan embodies the pathological characteristics of learned helplessness evidenced by ___________, _______________, ________________, and _______________.
John Taylor Gatto opens his essay “Against School: How Public Education Cripples Our Kids, and Why” as thus:
I taught for thirty years in some of the worst schools in Manhattan, and in some of the best, and during that time I became an expert in boredom. Boredom was everywhere in the world, and if you asked the kids, as I often did, why they felt so bored, they always gave the same answers: They said the work was stupid, that it made no sense, that they already knew it. They said they wanted to be doing something real, not just sitting around. They said teachers didn’t seem to know much about their subjects and clearly weren’t interested in learning more. And the kids were right: Their teachers were every bit as bored as they were.
Boredom is the common condition of schoolteachers, and anyone who has spent time in a teacher’s lounge can vouch for the low energy, the whining, the dispirited attitudes, to be found there. When asked why they feel bored, the teachers tend to blame the kids, as you might expect. Who wouldn’t get bored teaching students who are rude and interested only in grades? If even that. Of course, teachers are themselves products of the same twelve-year compulsory school programs that so thoroughly bore their students, and as school personnel they are trapped inside structures even more rigid than those imposed upon the children. Who, then, is to blame?
Gatto goes on to argue in his thesis that school trains children to be servants for mediocre (at best) jobs when school should be teaching innovation, individuality, and leadership roles.
Two. Write a definition based on the principles of extended definition (term, class, distinguishing characteristics) or quote an expert in a field of study:
Metacognition is an essential asset to mature people characterized by their ability to value long-term gratification over short-term gratification, their ability to distance themselves from their passions when they’re in a heated emotional state, their ability to stand back and see the forest instead of the trees, and their ability to continuously make assessments of the effectiveness of their major life choices. In the fiction of John Cheever and James Lasdun, we encounter characters that are woefully lacking in metacognition evidenced by _____________, ______________, _____________, and _______________.
According to Alexander Batthanany, member of the Viktor Frankl Institute, logotherapy, which is the search for meaning, “is identified as the primary motivational force in human beings.” Batthanany further explains that logotherapy is “based on three philosophical and psychological concepts: Freedom of Will, Will to Meaning, and Meaning in Life.” Embracing the concepts of logotherapy is vastly more effective than conventional, Freud-based psychotherapy when we consider ________________, ______________, __________________, and ________________.
Three. Use an insightful quotation that has not, to your knowledge anyway, been overused:
George Bernard Shaw once said, “There are two great tragedies in life. The first is not getting what we want. The second is getting it.” Shaw’s insight speaks to the tantalizing chimera, that elusive quest we take for the Mythic She-Beast who becomes are life-altering obsession. As the characters in John Cheever and James Lasdun’s fiction show, the human relationship with the chimera is source of paradox. On one hand, having a chimera will kill us. On the other, not having a chimera will kill us. Cheever and Lasdun’s characters twist and torment under the paradoxical forces of their chimeras evidenced by _____________, _______________, ______________, and __________________.
Four. Use a startling fact to get your reader’s attention:
There are currently more African-American men in prison than there were slaves at the peak of slavery in the United States. We read this disturbing fact in Michelle Alexander’s magisterial The New Jim Crow, which convincingly argues that America’s prison complex is perpetuating the racism of slavery and Jim Crow in several insidious ways.
We read that in the latest study by the Institute for Higher Education, Leadership & Policy at Cal State Sacramento that only 30% of California community college students are transferring or getting their degrees. We have a real challenge in the community college if 70% are falling by the wayside.
8,000 students walk through El Camino's Humanities Building every week. Only 10% will pass English 1A. Only 3% will pass English 1C.
99% of my students acknowledge that most students at El Camino are seriously compromised by their smartphone addiction to the point that the addiction is making them fail or do non-competitive work in college.
Five. Use an anecdote (personal or otherwise) to get your reader’s attention:
When my daughter was one years old and I was changing her diaper, she without warning jammed her thumb into my eye, forcing my eyeball into my brain and almost killing me. After the assault, I suffered migraine headaches for several months and frequently would have to wash milky pus from the injured eye.
One afternoon I was napping under the covers when Lara walked into the room talking on the phone to her friend, Hannah. She didn’t know I was in the room, confusing the mound on the bed with a clump of pillows and blankets. I heard her whisper to Hannah, “I found another small package from eBay. He’s buying watches and not telling me.”
That’s when I thought about getting a post office box.
This could be the opening introduction for an essay topic about “economic infidelity.”
As we read in Stephen King’s essay “Write or Die”:
“Hardly a week after being sprung from detention hall, I was once more invited to step down to the principal’s office. I went with a sinking heart, wondering what new sh** I’d stepped in.”
Six. Use a piece of vivid description or a vivid illustration to get your reader’s attention:
My gym looks like an enchanting fitness dome, an extravaganza of taut, sweaty bodies adorned in fluorescent spandex tights contorting on space-age cardio machines, oil-slicked skin shrouded in a synthetic fog of dry ice colored by the dizzying splash of lavender disco lights. Tribal drum music plays loudly. Bottled water flows freely, as if from some Elysian spring, over burnished flesh. The communal purgation appeals to me. My fellow cardio junkies and I are so self-abandoned, free, and euphoric, liberated in our gym paradise.
But right next to our workout heaven is a gastronomical inferno, one of those all-you-can-eat buffets, part of a chain, which is, to my lament, sprouting all over Los Angeles. I despise the buffet, a trough for people of less discriminating tastes who saunter in and out of the restaurant at all hours, entering the doors of the eatery without shame and blind to all the gastrointestinal and health-related horrors that await them. Many of the patrons cannot walk out of their cars to the buffet but have to limp or rely on canes, walkers, wheelchairs, and other ambulatory aids, for it seems a high percentage of the customers are afflicted with obesity, diabetes, arthritis, gout, hypothalamic lesions, elephantiasis, varicose veins and fleshy tumors. Struggling and wheezing as they navigate across the vast parking lot that leads to their gluttonous sanctuary, they seem to worship the very source of their disease.
In front of the buffet is a sign of rules and conduct. One of the rules urges people to stand in the buffet line in an orderly fashion and to be patient because there is plenty of food for everyone. Another rule is that children are not to be left unattended and running freely around the buffet area. My favorite rule is that no hands, tongues, or other body parts are allowed to touch the food. Tongs and other utensils are to be used at all times. The rules give you an idea of the kind of people who eat there. These are people I want to avoid.
But as I walk to the gym from my car, which shares a parking lot with the buffet patrons, I cannot avoid the nauseating smell of stale grease oozing from the buffet’s rear dumpster, army green and stained with splotches and a seaweed-like crust of yellow and brown grime.
Often I see cooks and dishwashers, their bodies covered with soot, coming out of the back kitchen door to throw refuse into the dumpster, a smoldering receptacle with hot fumes of bacteria and flies. Hunchbacked and knobby, the poor employees are old, weary men with sallow, rheumy eyes and cuts and bruises all over their bodies. I imagine them being tortured deep within the bowels of the fiery kitchen on some Medieval rack. They emerge into the blinding sunshine like moles, their eyes squinting, with their plastic garbage bags twice the size of their bodies slung over their shoulders, and then I look into their sad eyes—eyes that seem to beg for my help and mercy. And just when I am about to give them words of hope and consolation or urge them to flee for their lives, it seems they disappear back into the restaurant as if beckoned by some invisible tyrant.
The above could transition to the topic of people of a certain weight being required to buy three airline tickets for an entire row of seats.
Seven. Summarize both sides of a debate.
America is torn by the national healthcare debate. One camp says it’s a crime that 25,000 Americans die unnecessarily each year from treatable disease and that modeling a health system from other developed countries is a moral imperative. However, there is another camp that fears that adopting some version of universal healthcare is tantamount to stepping into the direction of socialism.
Eight. State a misperception, fallacy, or error that your essay will refute.
Americans against universal or national healthcare are quick to say that such a system is “socialist,” “communist,” and “un-American,” but a close look at their rhetoric shows that it is high on knee-jerk, mindless paroxysms and short on reality. Contrary to the enemies of national healthcare, providing universal coverage is very American and compatible with the American brand of capitalism.
Nine. Make a general statement about your topic.
From Sherry Turkle’s essay “How Computers Change the Way We Think”:
The tools we use to think change the ways in which we think. The invention of written language brought about a radical shift in how we process, organize, store, and transmit representations of the world. Although writing remains our primary information technology, today when we think about the impact of technology on our habits of mind, we think primarily of the computer.
Ten. Pose a question your essay will try to answer:
Why are diet books more and more popular, yet Americans are getting more and more fat?
Why is psychotherapy becoming more and more popular, yet Americans are getting more and more crazy?
Why are the people of Qatar the richest people in the world, yet score at the bottom of all Happiness Index metrics?
Why are courses in the Humanities more essential to your well-being that you might think?
What is the difference between thinking and critical thinking?
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