El Camino College English 1C Grading Rubric
Essay Guidelines
One. Your essay should be uploaded to turnitin on the day of class, no later than the time class starts.
Two. Your essay should be 1,250 words, about 5 pages, double-spaced using 12 font TimesNewRoman. On a separate page that does not count toward your word total is your MLA Works Cited page.
Three. Usually a research paper is about 80% your own words and 20% quoted, paraphrased, and summarized sources. You introduce sources with signal phrases: Common identifying tags (put link here). Signal phrases help you avoid plagiarism, give you credibility by virtue of the source's value, which briefly explain, and show that you are current on the topic.
Four. To make sure your essay is connected and relevant to the assigned text, be sure to refer to the text (The True American in this case) at least once per page by using a quotation, paraphrase, or summary.
Five. You can start with any appropriate introduction technique. The purpose of an introduction is twofold: Connect reader to your thesis and show reader you are an engaging, compelling writer. Never bore your reader in your introduction with a generic, obvious, or self-evident statement often beginning with "In today's society . . ."
Six. Your essay is graded by thesis, support and evidence for your thesis, appropriate research and signal phrases, appropriate MLA documentation, diction (writing clean, clear sentences and precise word choice), punctuation, and grammar.
Seven. Your thesis, which is your main point or argument, should be the engine that drives your essay.
Eight. You should shoot for 8 or 9 paragraphs in your essay.
Nine. Your paragraphs should be "meaty," about 120-150 words long, so that typically you'll have no more than 2 paragraphs per page.
Ten. It's common for the introduction paragraph to be as many as 200 words long.
Eleven. It's okay to have 2 introduction paragraphs before the thesis paragraph.
Suggested Outline for 8- or 9-paragraph essay
Paragraph One: Introduction that hook's reader's interest and connects reader to your thesis. You might for example write about the tension the American poor have for immigrants who are perceived to be having more success at achieving the American Dream.
You might elaborate on how this tension is creating the "two Americas" the author writes about in his book, The True American.
You might write two anecdotes, one about an immigrant and the other about an American-born citizen you know and show their different paths and how these paths coincide with The True American's narrative. If you choose this method, you will probably have two introduction paragraphs.
Paragraph Two or Three. Thesis paragraph that contains 4 or 5 mapping components that you will flesh out in your body paragraphs.
Paragraphs Three through Seven (or 4-8): Body Paragraphs
Paragraph Eight (or 9) is your conclusion that restates your thesis in a more emotional, powerful manner as we see here at the Harvard Writing Center.
Example of a Thesis That Requires Introduction with Extended Definition
Anand Girdharadas' masterpiece The True American makes a persuasive case for us to shun the metastasizing cancer of xenophobia and in its place embrace cosmopolitanism. By examining xenophobia, as an ideology, in the context of Girdharadas' book and cosmopolitanism, we gain a deeper understanding of what it means to be a false American and a true one.
Two Paragraphs That Define Important Terms Followed by the Thesis
The ideology of xenophobia, fear of the stranger, is rooted in ignorance, economic catastrophe, and the kind of desperate bigotry that needs to blame a scapegoat for what appears to be a world of overwhelming chaos that is replacing what the xenophobe perceives to be his lost paradise, an age where he felt a sense of power, entitlement, and belonging. For example, Donald Trump is the consummate xenophobe demagogue who has galvanized a swath of America's isolationist xenophobes in his quest to reside as America's Commander in Chief. As we read The True American, we see this xenophobia fuel white supremacist Mark Stroman's murder spree against men of color whom Stroman perceives to be Muslim terrorists. Giridharadas masterfully and compassionately shows that America is rife with legions of Mark Stroman's, unhinged, fatherless souls with no moral guidance or economic prospect, or sense of belonging. These broken spirits are vulnerable to the hate-filled ideologies of white supremacists and other rancid ideologues.
In stark contrast, Girdharadas juxtaposes this toxic xenophobia with Raisuddin Bhuiyan, the victim of Stroman's shooting spree who forgave his assailant and provided economic and emotional support to Stroman and Stroman's family. Bhuiyan is the antithesis of the xenophobe. Bhuyan is the cosmopolitan, the educated, moral citizen of the world whose immigration to America provides America with the type of people and resources that can make America a great country. When America embraces cosmopolitanism, the ideology that we all share a common morality and humanity, we become true to our country's mission.
Examining these opposite ideologies, Anand Girdharadas' masterpiece The True American makes a persuasive case for us to shun the metastasizing cancer of xenophobia and in its place embrace cosmopolitanism. By examining xenophobia, as an ideology, in the context of Girdharadas' book and cosmopolitanism, we gain a deeper understanding of what it means to be a false American and a true one.
Suggested Outline for Your Essay (slightly different than previous outline)
Paragraph 1: Explain a major conflict in the book such as the struggle for the American Dream between immigrants and American-born poor.
Paragraph 2: Write your thesis by answering an important question from the essay prompt.
Paragraphs 3-8: Write paragraphs that support your thesis.
Paragraph 9: Your conclusion is a restatement of your thesis with greater emotional power (pathos). Harvard has a good explanation of the conclusion paragraph.
Final page: MLA Works Cited (you can try Easy Bib). Be sure to using hanging indent format for MLA. Here's a Create MLA Works Cited video. Here's the 2016 MLA Format.
The Above Outline Needs to be Modified If You're Using Terms That Need to be Defined
For example, if your thesis contains terms that require extended definition, you may need to define your terms in your introductory paragraph.
Example of a Thesis That Requires Introduction with Extended Definition
Anand Girdharadas' masterpiece The True American makes a persuasive case for us to shun the metastasizing cancer of xenophobia and in its place embrace cosmopolitanism. By examining xenophobia, as an ideology, in the context of Girdharadas' book and cosmopolitanism, we gain a deeper understanding of what it means to be a false American and a true one.
Two Paragraphs That Define Important Terms Followed by the Thesis
The ideology of xenophobia, fear of the stranger, is rooted in ignorance, economic catastrophe, and the kind of desperate bigotry that needs to blame a scapegoat for what appears to be a world of overwhelming chaos that is replacing what the xenophobe perceives to be his lost paradise, an age where he felt a sense of power, entitlement, and belonging. For example, Donald Trump is the consummate xenophobe demagogue who has galvanized a swath of America's isolationist xenophobes in his quest to reside as America's Commander in Chief. As we read The True American, we see this xenophobia fuel white supremacist Mark Stroman's murder spree against men of color whom Stroman perceives to be Muslim terrorists. Giridharadas masterfully and compassionately shows that America is rife with legions of Mark Stroman's, unhinged, fatherless souls with no moral guidance or economic prospect, or sense of belonging. These broken spirits are vulnerable to the hate-filled ideologies of white supremacists and other rancid ideologues.
In stark contrast, Girdharadas juxtaposes this toxic xenophobia with Raisuddin Bhuiyan, the victim of Stroman's shooting spree who forgave his assailant and provided economic and emotional support to Stroman and Stroman's family. Bhuiyan is the antithesis of the xenophobe. Bhuyan is the cosmopolitan, the educated, moral citizen of the world whose immigration to America provides America with the type of people and resources that can make America a great country. When America embraces cosmopolitanism, the ideology that we all share a common morality and humanity, we become true to our country's mission.
Examining these opposite ideologies, Anand Girdharadas' masterpiece The True American makes a persuasive case for us to shun the metastasizing cancer of xenophobia and in its place embrace cosmopolitanism. By examining xenophobia, as an ideology, in the context of Girdharadas' book and cosmopolitanism, we gain a deeper understanding of what it means to be a false American and a true one.
Essay One, drawn from The True American, is Due September 21:
Option One
Develop a thesis that addresses these questions: What are the challenges of achieving the American Dream as we find ourselves in a place where the terror that threatens America from the outside collides with the barbarian within? In other words, how does this collision of forces make the American Dream more precarious and fragile than ever? What forces of light and wisdom are illuminated in The True American that might help us navigate out of this crisis?
What is the "barbarian within"?
When self-interest and ambition are not tempered by virtue and morality, they curdle into a toxic tribalism, racism, and prejudice that hurl hate at the "Outsider," or "Los Otros," as the scapegoat for all of one's problems, and for explaining why one is not getting "a big enough piece of the pie."
Sample Thesis
Anand Giridharadas' The True American convincingly shows the causes behind the giant divide between immigrants and the American-born poor. These causes include _______________, _______________, _______________, ________________, and __________________.
Sample Thesis
Anand Giridharadas makes the convincing case that as the American Dream, upward economic mobility, becomes more and more difficult, America is dividing into an tiny educated elite class and a forgotten class that we ignore at our peril.
Another Thesis
Anand Giridharadas makes the convincing case the America's Mark Stromans are a despised and forgotten class whose sense of collective insult imperils America in several ways, including _____________, ______________, _______________, and _______________.
Another Thesis
Giridharadas argues convincingly that Mark Stroman is our own creation, the product of America's neglect of the working class, elite America's condescension toward the lower classes, and America's failure to nourish society with moral absolutes. We can conclude therefore that we are all guilty of Mark Stroman's crime.
Another Thesis
Anand Giridharadas' The True American is a piece of shameful liberal demagoguery that would have us believe that Mark Stroman's evil is not the result of his individual responsibility but rather some sort of "collective guilt" that we all share in order that the author can disseminate his elitist left-wing socialist "kumbaya" propaganda.
Another Thesis
While Giridharadas does a good job of showing the tension and animosity between the "two Americas," the elitist and working class, his book ultimately is a manipulative propaganda piece that emphasizes so much forgiveness, socialist redistribution of wealth, and collective guilt that the book is a colossal moral failure in its inability to address the urgent need for justice, economic meritocracy, and individual responsibility.
Another Thesis
Those who attempt to dismiss Giridharadas as a manipulative left-wing hack prove to be intellectually and morally bankrupt evidenced by their failure to address systemic shifts in the economy that are destroying the middle class, failure to acknowledge the unraveling of the American family and the moral foundation such a family provides, and failure to give credit to the contribution that immigrants make by passing on their family's moral richness to American society.
Essay Option Two
Develop a argumentative thesis that answers the following question: How does the current Presidential campaign that many say features a racist, xenophobic demagogue (a leader who preys on prejudice, racism, and xenophobia rather than use rational argument) parallel the crisis of two Americas described in The True American?
Sample Thesis
The True American addresses the crisis of two Americas, which have many parallels to the current Presidential campaign evidenced by ________________, ___________________, _________________, and ___________________.
Another Sample Thesis
The True American dug out of the crypt an ugly America at war with the rest of America. This divided America is both illustrated in The True American and the current Presidential campaign evidenced by ____________, ___________, _____________, and __________________.
Essay Option Three (more specific)
How does David Brooks' essay "The Moral Bucket List" speak to the moral crisis described in The True American?
Sample Thesis
David Brooks' essay "The Moral Bucket List" complements The True American evidenced by __________, _________, ____________, and __________________.
Another Thesis
Raisuddin Bhuiyan embodies the virtues discussed in David Brooks' "The Moral Bucket List" evidenced by _____________, ____________, _______________, and _____________________.
167-233
One. How might one argue against the sympathetic humanization of Mark Stroman in the book? How might one support this apparent humanizing of Stroman?
As Stroman gains introspection and begins to post on a blog, his pain and “death” from waiting in the Row becomes dramatized. His fatigue, sorrow, and tears are chronicled. Some would say this alone time in prison is bringing out his humanity and speaks to the cruelties of the Row.
Others would say this a “bleeding heart” piece, that Stroman is getting what he deserves, that killers always get soft in prison, getting in touch with their sensitive side and painting themselves as misunderstood misfits who deserve a second chance. Many, like Stroman, claim to have found religion.
Clearly, no matter what the readers believe, Rais is sympathetic and wants Stroman to be spared the death penalty.
My problem with Stroman and murderers like him is that they become part of some grand redemption narrative, with book deals, film makers showing up, and authors showing these amazing character transformations. In other words, these murderers become relevant, they become characters in our imaginations, and I wonder if this relevance they find as they become grand characters in the world’s collective consciousness feeds their vanity and encourages people in a perverse way to become part of this attention-seeking narrative as we try to find meaning in the chaos of violent crime.
Perhaps the biggest, real change in Stroman is that he views his family as the source of his problems, the reason for “being the way he is” (175). He finds a new group of people, such the filmmaker, who represent positive change and support.
Ilan Ziv tells Stroman that Stroman should be in prison for life without parole upon which Stroman says he killed because he believed that what he was doing was right (185). People should be accountable for being that dangerously ignorant.
Two. What does the book say about revenge?
Revenge is a never-ending cycle. Texas kills murderers to get revenge for their crime of murder. The 9/11 hijackers were looking for revenge. Stroman was looking for revenge. The cycle never ends (186). The theme of revenge as a never-ending destructive cycle is masterfully rendered in the 2005 film Munich.
The death penalty shouldn’t focus on revenge; it should focus on the murderer not being able to repeat his crime, either in or out of prison.
Anti-death penalty activist Rick Halperin argues that Stroman is a symbol for American violence in a post-9/11 world. America needed revenge and had “gone off the rails” by forgetting its essential nature of justice, fairness, and human rights as America wanted to lash out blindly and kill in the name of revenge (204). As Stroman turned to violence, so did America. Both Stroman and America “ignored the truth” we invaded Iraq, set up illegal prisons in Guantanamo and committed war crimes.
Three. What is the irony of Stroman’s psychological rehabilitation?
All of his helpers were from outside America. Here’s a man who lived by the “Born in the USA” adage, but ended up wanting his ashes discarded outside the USA.
Another outside influence, ironically enough, is a European Jew, Viktor Frankl, author of Man’s Search for Meaning.
Perhaps the book’s most cogent theme is that we should not be provincial tribalists, but embrace universal moral values that transcend nationality.
This book is about seeing people, not groups (190).
Seeing groups, not people, is at the root of a lot of violence. Think of all the mass killings since time and they are about killing groups without seeing the individual people.
Rais sees people and is a pious, peaceful Muslim who wants to help the poor. He is so good natured, he misinterprets the Koran to say that the Koran would save someone like Stroman from the death penalty, but the author points out that this isn’t true (228, 229).
In contrast, Stroman is a fanatical patriot who blindly wants to avenge the 9/11 attacks and ironically becomes the very terrorist he claims to despise.
One. What is another irony about Stroman’s waiting to die on death row?
He tells his daughters he’s finally alive: “This saved my life.” He now possesses the idea of good and evil, a rise and a fall, a “higher and lower way of being” (237). Before he committed his shooting spree, was sentenced, and educate by his newfound friends, he was a nihilist, an animal with no meaning. He sees himself now as someone who can “reserve a table in heaven” (237).
Two. In the aftermath of Stroman’s death, describe Rais’ conversation in a Starbucks with Stroman’s daughter Amber.
Amber is mad at the victims of her father’s shootings. She can’t blame her father, just her victims.
She is suspicious of a man who gave comfort to her father since she and her father are Christian and Rais is a Muslim.
Rais laments for the lack of safety nets and social supports Amber has as she struggles to get her daughter back and to go to rehab.
On a larger point, Rais wants at-risk people like Amber to get help in achieving the American Dream, so there will be less crazy, violent people (258).
In many ways, Rais finds purpose from this tragedy, and he fulfills the points made in Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning.
Rais wants to help Americans “wake up” and re-connect through the values of forgiveness and compassion (259). He notices immigrants have this urgency to come to America and do well to make their parents’ proud. But Americans like Amber know no such thing as pride or honor. They don’t have this strong connection with their parents. There is drunkenness and a moral dissolution in too many American families that impoverishes America.
Three. In many ways the book is a critique of the American Dream. Explain.
America has a dying middle class. Its working class is treading water with no safety net. Desperate, the poor and the working class (too often one and the same) are frustrated that they are failing, and they are looking for scapegoats.
To make their suffering worse, they don’t know how to connect with one another. Too many people are disconnected on drugs, alcohol, and social media, rendered zombies, unable to grasp complex reasons for their society’s dissolving before their eyes.
Demagogues with simplistic answers too often appeal to these at-risk people. These demagogues will blame “foreigners” and strangers for Americans’ problems when in fact many of America’s problems are from the crumbling of the American Dream and the crumbling of human connections in what’s becoming a “lone wolf” country.
Sample Introduction and Thesis (with surprising conclusion)
McMahon assigned Anand Girdharadas’ book The True American for my Critical Thinking class. It is an excellent book, well written, timely, relevant, complete with a compelling narrative about the “two Americas,” the one of broken families, drugs, and terminal unemployment and the one of strong families, morals, and seized opportunities to achieve the American Dream. I commend McMahon on his reading choice and will always remember the noble principles this book contains (hats off to you, McMahon).
However, what I take away from this book is not any kind of strong moral uplifting message. To the contrary, I am deeply depressed, for the biggest lesson I’ve learned from reading AG’s masterpiece is the pathetic limitations of writing. One can write a topnotch, best-selling book that provides a compelling moral lesson on our need for America’s bitter factions to listen to one another, on the need to forego our tribalistic racial prejudices in favor of a more cosmopolitan worldview, and our need to fight for economic justice. But AG’s well-supported argument for these principles is a worthless exercise in futility, for what real changes have resulted from the publication of his book? None. To the contrary, since AG’s book has been published, all of the toxic acrimony, racism, and economic disparity chronicled in AG’s True American has exacerbated and metastasized across the land.
Why is this so? For one, only an infinitesimal percentage of the American public reads, so the number of Americans who will read this book and drink AG’s Kool-Aid is comparatively nil. Second, the small percentage of people who buy AG’s book already share his political philosophy. Therefore, AG is simply preaching to the converted choir. Third, the heart-warming dialogue that took place between Mark Stroman and Raisuddin Bhuiyan was a special circumstance that does not reflect any kind of trend of “open dialogues” between white supremacists and struggling immigrants. Their friendship was an aberration, an exception to the rule, a storybook event that Lifetime movies are made of.
So while I admire AG’s good intentions, in the end I’m deeply depressed over the futility of writing—even the great writing evident in The True American.
If there is one positive note in all this, after reading The True American, I’ve decided to switch my major from Music to Business, and dedicate myself to making tons of money so I won’t get punked by the abominable economic system described in AG’s book.
Counterargument Thesis
The above thesis, clearly written by someone in state of acute distress and depression, is a loathsome thesis, a disgusting thesis, and a very wrong thesis, its egregious sins almost on the verge of being incalculable. But since my professor McMahon has taken this student’s depressive thesis to heart so much so that McMahon is on the verge of drinking this student’s depressive Kool-Aid, I will now show why McMahon can free himself from this depressive student’s notions, and I also hope the cynical, lachrymose student will be freed by my counterargument as well.
Let it be made clear from the beginning that this cynical response to AG’s masterpiece The True American is so larded with imbecilic clichés, irrational, infantile feelings, and spurious logical fallacies that his thesis teeters on the ridiculous.
For one, the writer claims that subsequent to the publication of The True American, the social problems described therein have actually gotten worse. Such an asinine statement evidences three logical fallacies: hasty generalization, either/or and post hoc fallacies. We cannot measure the good AG’s book will do in the next five, ten or twenty years. That the writer is dissatisfied with the amount of social change in the aftermath of AG’s book publication does not speak to any concrete measure of the book’s effectiveness or worth. Nor can we place blame for our country's apparent increased racism and economic injustice on The True American or even the belief that such a book can benefit or hurt us. Such assumptions confuse correlation with causation. Third, the notion that either The True American creates X amount of measured social benefit or must be deemed worthless is an absurd either/or fallacy.
Another preposterous notion in the depressive writer’s response is that we can take little solace in the fact that “only an infinitesimal percentage” of the American public reads. So what? If the majority of people decide on ignorance and racism, does it mean I must compromise my morals and follow the majority's intellectual and moral bankruptcy? To do so would be to commit what in common parlance is known as the Bandwagon Fallacy.
Finally, let us examine the depressive writer’s change of major to Business so as to “make tons of money.” This conversion to selfish materialism is yet evidence of another fallacy: Two Wrongs Don’t Make a Right. If we live in a society teeming with economic injustice, we don’t have the right to become avaricious Darwinian predators who seek to make as much money as possible while preying upon the exploited masses.
In sum, the depressive writer’s conclusions are absurd, preposterous, morally bankrupt, and self-destructive, and no reasonable human being would be inclined to follow them.
Recognizing Logical Fallacies
A Logical Fallacy List from Fullerton
Begging the Question (assuming the initial point)
Begging the question assumes that a statement is self-evident when it actually requires proof.
Major Premise: Fulfilling all my major desires is the only way I can be happy.
Minor Premise: I can’t afford when of my greatest desires in life, a Lexus GS350.
Conclusion: Therefore, I can never be happy.
The initial premise is false.
Major premise: Happiness is only possible through marriage.
Minor premise: Person X is not married.
Conclusion: Person X cannot be happy.
The initial premise is false.
Major premise: Only believers in God are moral.
Minor premise: Person Y doesn't believe in God.
Conclusion: Person Y cannot be moral.
Circular Reasoning
Circular reasoning occurs when we support a statement by restating it in different terms.
Stealing is wrong because it is illegal.
Admitting women into the men’s club is wrong because it’s an invalid policy.
Your essay is woefully put together because of its egregious construction.
Your boyfriend is hideous because of his heinous characteristics.
I have to sell my car because I’m ready to sell it.
I can’t spend time with my kids because it’s too time consuming.
I need to spend more money on my presents than my family’s presents because I need bigger and better presents.
I’m a great father because I’m the best father my children have ever had.
Weak Analogy or Faulty Comparison
Analogies are never perfect but they can be powerful. The question is do they have a degree of validity to make them worth the effort.
A toxic relationship is like a cancer that gets worse and worse (fine).
Sugar is high-octane fuel to use before your workout (weak because there is nothing high-octane about a substance that causes you to crash and converts into fat and creates other problems)
Free education is a great flame and the masses are moths flying into the flames of destruction. (horribly false analogy)
Ad Hominem Fallacy (Personal Attack)
“Who are you to be a marriage counselor? You’ve been divorced six times?”
A lot of people give great advice and present sound arguments even if they don’t apply their principles to their lives, so we should focus on the argument, not personal attack.
“So you believe in universal health care, do you? I suppose you’re a communist and you hate America as well.”
Making someone you disagree with an American-hating communist is invalid and doesn’t address the actual argument.
“What do you mean you don’t believe in marriage? What are you, a crazed nihilist, an unrepentant anarchist, an immoral misanthrope, a craven miscreant?”
I hear you're voting for Person X. Obviously, we can conclude you're a racist, a homophobe, and a sociopath.
Straw Man Fallacy
You twist and misconstrue your opponent’s argument to make it look weaker than it is when you refute it. Instead of attacking the real issue, you aim for a weaker issue based on your deliberate misinterpretation of your opponent’s argument.
“Those who are against universal health care are heartless. They obviously don’t care if innocent children die. They probably eat children for dessert."
"Your proposal to cut food stamps is an attempt to starve poor adults, innocent children, and disabled geriatrics. You should be ashamed of yourself."
Hasty Generalization (Jumping to a Conclusion)
“I’ve had three English instructors who are middle-aged bald men. Therefore, all English instructors are middle-aged bald men.”
“I’ve met three Americans with false British accents and they were all annoying. Therefore, all Americans, such as Madonna, who contrive British accents are annoying.” Perhaps some Americans do so ironically and as a result are more funny than annoying.
"My great grandfather smoked five packs of cigarettes a day and drank three pints of whisky every day and lived to 110. Clearly, tobacco and alcohol are good for you."
Either/Or Fallacy
There are only two choices to an issue is an over simplification and an either/or fallacy.
“Either you be my girlfriend or you don’t like real men.”
“Either you be my boyfriend or you’re not a real American.”
“Either you play football for me or you’re not a real man.”
“Either you’re for us or against us.” (The enemy of our enemy is our friend is every day foreign policy.)
“Either you agree with me about increasing the minimum wage, or you’re okay with letting children starve to death.”
“Either you get a 4.0 and get admitted into USC, or you’re only half a man.”
Equivocation
Equivocation occurs when you deliberately twist the meaning of something in order to justify your position.
“You told me the used car you just sold me was in ‘good working condition.’”
“I said ‘good,’ not perfect.”
The seller is equivocating.
“I told you to be in bed by ten.”
“I thought you meant be home by ten.”
“You told me you were going to pay me the money you owe me on Friday.”
“I didn’t know you meant the whole sum.”
“You told me you were going to take me out on my birthday.”
“Technically speaking, the picnic I made for us in the backyard was a form of ‘going out.’”
Red Herring Fallacy
This fallacy is to throw a distraction in your opponent’s face because you know a distraction may help you win the argument.
“Barack Obama wants us to support him but his father was a Muslim. How can we trust the President on the war against terrorism when he has terrorist ties?”
“You said you were going to pay me my thousand dollars today. Where is it?”
“Dear friend, I’ve been diagnosed with a very serious medical condition. Can we talk about our money issue some other time?”
Slippery Slope Fallacy
We go down a rabbit hole of exaggerated consequences to make our point sound convincing.
“If we allow gay marriage, we’ll have to allow people to marry gorillas.”
“If we allow gay marriage, my marriage to my wife will be disrespected and dishonored.”
Appeal to Authority
Using a celebrity to promote an energy drink doesn’t make this drink effective in increasing performance.
Listening to an actor play a doctor on TV doesn’t make the pharmaceutical he’s promoting safe or effective.
"The Bible says Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve."
Tradition Fallacy
“We’ve never allowed women into our country club. Why should we start now?”
“Women have always served men. That’s the way it’s been and that’s the way it always should be.”
Misuse of Statistics
Using stats to show causality when it’s a condition of correlation or omitting other facts.
“Ninety-nine percent of people who take this remedy see their cold go away in ten days.” (Colds go away on their own).
“Violent crime from home intruders goes down twenty percent in home equipped with guns.” (more people in those homes die of accidental shootings or suicides)
Post Hoc, Confusing Causality with Correlation
Taking cold medicine makes your cold go away. Really?
The rooster crows and makes the sun go up. Really?
You drink on a Thursday night and on Friday morning you get an A on your calculus exam. Really?
You stop drinking milk and you feel stronger. Really? (or is it placebo effect?)
Non Sequitur (It Does Not Follow)
The conclusion in an argument is not relevant to the premises.
Megan drives a BMW, so she must be rich.
McMahon understands the difference between a phrase and a dependent clause; therefore, he must be a genius.
Whenever I eat chocolate cake, I feel good. Therefore, chocolate cake must be good for me.
Bandwagon Fallacy
Because everyone believes something, it must be right.
“You can steal a little at work. Everyone else does.”
“In Paris, ninety-nine percent of all husbands have a secret mistress. Therefore adultery is not immoral.”
"All my male friends make misognyistic comments about their girlfriends and frequently cheat on them, so this behavior must be acceptable, desirable even."
Using Signal Phrases or Identifying Tag to Introduce Summary, Paraphrase, and Quoted Material
According to Jeff McMahon, the grading rubric in English classes is used in such a way by instructors that soon there will be no such thing as an “easy” or “hard” professor. They’ll all be the same.
Jeff McMahon notes that the grading rubric in English classes is used in such a way by instructors that soon there will be no such thing as an “easy” or “hard” professor. They’ll all be the same.
The grading rubric in English classes is used in such a way by instructors, Jeff McMahon observes, that soon there will be no such thing as an “easy” or “hard” professor.
The grading rubric in English classes is used in such a way by instructors that soon there will be no such thing as an “easy” or “hard” professor, Jeff McMahon points out.
According to Andrea A. Lunsford in The St. Martin’s Handbook, Eight Edition, there are 20 writing errors that merit “The Top 20.”
One. Wrong word: Confusing one word for another.
Here's a list of wrong word usage.
A full-bodied red wine compliments the Pasta Pomodoro.
Compliment is a to say something nice about someone.
Complement is to complete or match well with something.
The BMW salesman excepted my counteroffer of 55K for the sports sedan.
The word should be accepted.
Kryptonite effects Superman in such a way that he loses his powers.
Effect is a noun. Affect is a verb, so it should be the following:
Kryptonite affects Superman in a such a way that he loses his powers.
There superpowers were compromised by the Gamma rays.
We need to use the possessive plural pronoun their.
Two. Missing comma after an introductory phrase or clause
Terrified of slimy foods, Robert hid behind the restaurant’s dumpster.
In spite of my aversion to rollercoasters, I attended the carnival with my family.
Three. Incomplete documentation
Noted dietician and nutritionist Mike Manderlin observes that, “Dieting is a mental illness.”
It should read:
Noted dietician and nutritionist Mike Manderlin observes that, “Dieting is a mental illness” (277).
Four. Vague Pronoun Reference
Focusing on the pecs during your Monday-Wednesday-Friday workouts is a way of giving you more time to work on your quads and glutes and specializing on the way they’re used in different exercises.
Before Jennifer screamed at Brittany, she came to the conclusion that she was justified in stealing her boyfriend.
Five. Spelling (including homonyms, words that have same spelling but different meanings)
No one came forward to bare witness to the crime.
No one came forward to bear witness to the crime.
Every where we went, we saw fast food restaurants.
Everywhere we went, we saw fast food restaurants.
Love is a disease. It’s sickness derives from its power to intoxicate and create capricious, short-term infatuation.
Its sickness derives from its power to intoxicate and create capricious, short-term infatuation.
Six. Mechanical error with a quotation
In his best-selling book Love Is a Virus from Outer Space, noted psychologist Michael M. Manderlin asserts that, “Falling in love is a form of madness for which there is no cure”.
In his best selling book Love Is a Virus from Outer Space, noted psychologist Michael M. Manderlin asserts that, “Falling in love is a form of madness for which there is no cure.”
In his best selling book Love Is a Virus from Outer Space, noted psychologist Michael M. Manderlin asserts that, “Falling in love is a form of madness for which there is no cure” (18).
“It forever stuns me that people make life decisions based on something as fickle and capricious as love”, Michael Manderlin writes (22).
“It forever stuns me that people make life decisions based on something as fickle and capricious as love,” Michael Manderlin writes (22).
Seven . Unnecessary comma
I need to workout when at home, and while taking vacations.
You do however use a comma if the comma is between two independent clauses:
I need to workout at home, and when I go on vacations, I bring my yoga mat to hotels.
I need to workout every day, because I’m addicted to the exercise-induced dopamine.
You do however use a comma after a dependent clause beginning with because:
Because I’m addicted to exercise-induced dopamine, I need to workout everyday.
Peaches, that are green, taste hideous.
The above is an example of an independent clause with a essential information or restrictive information. Not all peaches taste hideous, only green ones. The meaning of the entire sentence needs the dependent clause so there are no commas.
However, if the clause is additional information, the clause is called nonessential or nonrestrictive, and we do use commas:
Peaches, which are on sale at Whole Foods, are my favorite fruit.
Eight. Unnecessary or missing capitalization
Some Traditional Chinese Medicines containing Ephedra remain legal.
We only use capital letters for proper nouns, proper adjectives, first words of sentences, important words in titles, along with certain words indicating directions and family relationships.
Nine. Missing word
The site foreman discriminated women and promoted men with less experience.
The site foreman discriminated against women and promoted men with less experience.
Chris’ behavior becomes bizarre that his family asks for help.
Chris’ behavior becomes so bizarre that his family asks for help.
Ten. Faulty sentence structure
The information which high school athletes are presented with mainly includes information on what credits needed to graduate and thinking about the college which athletes are trying to play for, and apply.
A sentence that starts out with one kind of structure and then changes to another kind can confuse readers. Make sure that each sentence contains a subject and a verb, that subjects and predicates make sense together, and that comparisons have clear meanings. When you join elements (such as subjects or verb phrases) with a coordinating conjunction, make sure that the elements have parallel structures.
The reason I prefer yoga at home to the gym is because I prefer privacy.
I prefer yoga at home to the gym because of privacy.
11. Missing Comma with a Nonrestrictive Element
Marina who was the president of the club was the first to speak.
The clause who was the president of the club does not affect the basic meaning of the sentence: Marina was the first to speak.
A nonrestrictive element gives information not essential to the basic meaning of the sentence. Use commas to set off a nonrestrictive element.
12. Unnecessary Shift in Verb Tense
Priya was watching the great blue heron. Then she slips and falls into the swamp.
Verbs that shift from one tense to another with no clear reason can confuse readers.
13. Missing Comma in a Compound Sentence
Meredith waited for Samir and her sister grew impatient.
Without the comma, a reader may think at first that Meredith waited for both Samir and her sister.
A compound sentence consists of two or more parts that could each stand alone as a sentence. When the parts are joined by a coordinating conjunction, use a comma before the conjunction to indicate a pause between the two thoughts.
14. Unnecessary or Missing Apostrophe (including its/it's)
Overambitious parents can be very harmful to a childs well-being.
The car is lying on it's side in the ditch. Its a white 2004 Passat.
To make a noun possessive, add either an apostrophe and an s (Ed's book) or an apostrophe alone (the boys' gym). Do not use an apostrophe in the possessive pronouns ours, yours, and hers. Useits to mean belong to it; use it's only when you mean it is or it has.
15. Fused (run-on) sentence
Klee's paintings seem simple, they are very sophisticated.
She doubted the value of medication she decided to try it once.
A fused sentence (also called a run-on) joins clauses that could each stand alone as a sentence with no punctuation or words to link them. Fused sentences must be either divided into separate sentences or joined by adding words or punctuation.
16. Comma Splice
I was strongly attracted to her, she was beautiful and funny.
We hated the meat loaf, the cafeteria served it every Friday.
A comma splice occurs when only a comma separates clauses that could each stand alone as a sentence. To correct a comma splice, you can insert a semicolon or period, connect the clauses with a word such as and or because, or restructure the sentence.
17. Lack of pronoun/antecedent agreement
Every student must provide their own uniform.
Pronouns must agree with their antecedents in gender (male or female) and in number (singular or plural). Many indefinite pronouns, such as everyone and each, are always singular. When a singular antecedent can refer to a man or woman, either rewrite the sentence to make the antecedent plural or to eliminate the pronoun, or use his or her, he or she, and so on. When antecedents are joined by or or nor, the pronoun must agree with the closer antecedent. A collection noun such as team can be either singular or plural, depending on whether the members are seen as a group or individuals.
18. Poorly Integrated Quotation
A 1970s study of what makes food appetizing "Once it became apparent that the steak was actually blue and the fries were green, some people became ill" (Schlosser 565).
Corrected
In a 1970s study about what makes food appetizing, we read, "Once it became apparent that the steak was actually blue and the fries were green, some people became ill" (Schlosser 565).
"Dumpster diving has serious drawbacks as a way of life" (Eighner 383). Finding edible food is especially tricky.
Corrected
"Dumpster diving has serious drawbacks as a way of life," we read in Eighner's book (383). One of the drawbacks is that finding food can be especially difficult.
Quotations should fit smoothly into the surrounding sentence structure. They should be linked clearly to the writing around them (usually with a signal phrase) rather than dropped abruptly into the writing.
19. Missing or Unnecessary Hyphen
This paper looks at fictional and real life examples.
A compound adjective modifying a noun that follows it requires a hyphen.
The buyers want to fix-up the house and resell it.
A two-word verb should not be hyphenated. A compound adjective that appears before a noun needs a hyphen. However, be careful not to hyphenate two-word verbs or word groups that serve as subject complements.
20. Sentence Fragment
No subject
Marie Antoinette spent huge sums of money on herself and her favorites. And helped to bring on the French Revolution.
No complete verb
The aluminum boat sitting on its trailer.
Beginning with a subordinating word
We returned to the drugstore. Where we waited for our buddies.
A sentence fragment is part of a sentence that is written as if it were a complete sentence. Reading your draft out loud, backwards, sentence by sentence, will help you spot sentence fragments.
McMahon Grammar Exercise: Essential and Nonessential Clauses
Circle the relative clause and indicate if it’s essential with a capital E or nonessential with a capital N. Then use commas where necessary.
One. I’m looking for a sugar substitute that doesn’t have dangerous side effects.
Two. Sugar substitutes which often contain additives can wreak havoc on the digestive and nervous system.
Three. The man who trains in the gym every day for five hours is setting himself up for a serious muscle injury.
Four. Cars that operate on small turbo engines don’t last as long as non-turbo automobiles.
Five. Tuna which contains high amounts of mercury should only be eaten once or twice a week.
Six. The store manager who took your order has been arrested for fraud.
Seven. The store manager Ron Cousins who is now seventy-five years old is contemplating retirement.
Eight. Magnus Mills’ Restraint of Beasts which is my favorite novel was runner up for the Booker Prize.
Nine. Parenthood which is a sort of priesthood for which there is no pay or appreciation raises stress and cortisol levels.
Ten. I need to find a college that specializes in my actuarial math major.
Eleven. UCLA which has a strong actuarial math program is my first choice.
Twelve. My first choice of car is the Lexus which was awarded top overall quality honors from Consumer Reports.
Thirteen. Mangoes which sometimes cause a rash on my lips and chin area are my favorite fruit.
Fourteen. A strange man whom I’ve never known came up to me and offered to give me his brand new Mercedes.
Fifteen. My girlfriend who was showing off her brand new red dress arrived two hours late to the birthday party.
Sixteen. Students who meticulously follow the MLA format rules have a greater chance at success.
Seventeen. The student who tormented himself with the thesis lesson for six hours found himself more confused than before he started.
Eighteen. There are several distinctions between an analytical and argumentative thesis which we need to familiarize ourselves with before we embark on the essay assignment.
Nineteen. The peach that has a worm burrowing through its rotted skin should probably be tossed in the garbage.
Twenty. Peaches, which I love to eat by the bucketful are on sale at the farmer’s market.
Twenty-one. Baseball which used to be America’s pastime is declining in popularity.
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