Homework #10 for October 11:
I changed Homework 10 to save you some time and to makes things more clear. I replaced the two long readings on the syllabus for October 11 with two videos. "This Will Change Everything You Know" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=39RS3XbT2pU) and PBS Newshour "Why We Should be More Like Cats and Less Like Dogs" ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UROaLW8lmc0 ) and write a 3-paragraph essay that explains how social media is manipulating us.
Essay Option H Is Now Included for Essay #3
Option H
In the context YouTube video "This Will Change Everything You Know" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=39RS3XbT2pU) and PBS Newshour "Why We Should be More Like Cats and Less Like Dogs" ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UROaLW8lmc0 ), defend, refute, or complicate the contention that loss of privacy, advertising on "free" social media sites and fake news is part of a system that manipulates us to the point that we have good reason to delete our Facebook account. You may also consult Netflix's "Terms and Conditions May Apply."
Essay #3 Due 10-18-18
Option A
In the context of David Freedman’s “The War on Stupid People,” support, refute, or complicate Freedman’s contention that we marginalize average people at our own peril, socially, pragmatically, morally, and otherwise. Is there a "war" on "stupid" people or is the author using hyperbole in an inappropriate manner? Is there not intrinsic hardship in belonging to bottom 10% of intelligence? Do we need to explain such hardship by saying a "war" has been waged? Does Freedman handle these questions adequately?
Option B
In the context of the Netflix documentary Dirty Money, Episode #1, "Hard Nox," support, refute, or complicate the assertion that in spite of Volkswagen's 30 billion dollars paid in fines and legal fees for committing fraud and other crimes, that their ascent in the world economy is evidence that Volkswagen, as an agency of unbridled corporate greed, has triumphed over the wheels of justice. For your sources, you can use the documentary, the Vulture review, and the Atlantic review.
Option C
Read Jessica McCrory Calarco’s essay “‘Free-Range’ Parenting’s Unfair Double Standard” and support or refute her claim. See Washington Post and Reason’s “The Fragile Generation.”
Option D
Read the online essay "It's been hot before" and write an argumentative essay about the role logical fallacies play in the dangerous denial of global warming and global drought. For another source, you can consult "The 5 telltale techniques of climate change denial." Also, see Netflix Explained, "The World's Water Crisis."
Option E
In the context of Michael Gerson’s “The Last Temptation,” support, refute, or complicate the claim that evangelicals are shooting their foot by supporting the “least traditionally religious president in living memory.”
Option F
Write an argumentative essay that addresses the viability of electric scooters as a thriving business model for alternative modes of transportation. Consider the advances in technology, the share economy, and the benefits of regulations measured against sidewalk traffic and legal liability.
Option G
Read Gabrielle Glaser’s “The Irrationality of Alcoholics Anonymous” and support, refute, or complicate Glaser’s assertion that AA is an overrated, untested program.
Option H
In the context YouTube video "This Will Change Everything You Know" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=39RS3XbT2pU) and PBS Newshour "Why We Should be More Like Cats and Less Like Dogs" ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UROaLW8lmc0 ), defend, refute, or complicate the contention that loss of privacy, advertising on "free" social media sites and fake news is part of a system that manipulates us to the point that we have good reason to delete our Facebook account. You may also consult Netflix's "Terms and Conditions May Apply."
Annotated Excerpts from "The Irrationality of Alcoholics Anonymous":
"I Am Powerless" Doctrine
Alcoholics Anonymous was established in 1935, when knowledge of the brain was in its infancy. It offers a single path to recovery: lifelong abstinence from alcohol. The program instructs members to surrender their ego, accept that they are “powerless” over booze, make amends to those they’ve wronged, and pray.
AA makes claims without backing up with studies:
Alcoholics Anonymous is famously difficult to study. By necessity, it keeps no records of who attends meetings; members come and go and are, of course, anonymous. No conclusive data exist on how well it works. In 2006, the Cochrane Collaboration, a health-care research group, reviewed studies going back to the 1960s and found that “no experimental studies unequivocally demonstrated the effectiveness of AA or [12-step] approaches for reducing alcohol dependence or problems.”
The Big Book includes an assertion first made in the second edition, which was published in 1955: that AA has worked for 75 percent of people who have gone to meetings and “really tried.” It says that 50 percent got sober right away, and another 25 percent struggled for a while but eventually recovered. According to AA, these figures are based on members’ experiences.
Blind Faith in AA:
I spent three years researching a book about women and alcohol, Her Best-Kept Secret: Why Women Drink—And How They Can Regain Control, which was published in 2013. During that time, I encountered disbelief from doctors and psychiatrists every time I mentioned that the Alcoholics Anonymous success rate appears to hover in the single digits. We’ve grown so accustomed to testimonials from those who say AA saved their life that we take the program’s efficacy as an article of faith. Rarely do we hear from those for whom 12-step treatment doesn’t work. But think about it: How many celebrities can you name who bounced in and out of rehab without ever getting better? Why do we assume they failed the program, rather than that the program failed them?
AA members don't want critical thinking but criticism will "kill people":
When my book came out, dozens of Alcoholics Anonymous members said that because I had challenged AA’s claim of a 75 percent success rate, I would hurt or even kill people by discouraging attendance at meetings. A few insisted that I must be an “alcoholic in denial.” But most of the people I heard from were desperate to tell me about their experiences in the American treatment industry. Amy Lee Coy, the author of the memoir From Death Do I Part: How I Freed Myself From Addiction, told me about her eight trips to rehab, starting at age 13. “It’s like getting the same antibiotic for a resistant infection—eight times,” she told me. “Does that make sense?”
One Size Fits All Fallacy
Alcoholics Anonymous has more than 2 million members worldwide, and the structure and support it offers have helped many people. But it is not enough for everyone. The history of AA is the story of how one approach to treatment took root before other options existed, inscribing itself on the national consciousness and crowding out dozens of newer methods that have since been shown to work better.
AA sits near the bottom of the addiction effectiveness ranking:
A meticulous analysis of treatments, published more than a decade ago in The Handbook of Alcoholism Treatment Approaches but still considered one of the most comprehensive comparisons, ranks AA 38th out of 48 methods. At the top of the list are brief interventions by a medical professional; motivational enhancement, a form of counseling that aims to help people see the need to change; and acamprosate, a drug that eases cravings. (An oft-cited 1996 study found 12-step facilitation—a form of individual therapy that aims to get the patient to attend AA meetings—as effective as cognitive behavioral therapy and motivational interviewing. But that study, called Project Match, was widely criticized for scientific failings, including the lack of a control group.)
AA's binge-drink theory, which doesn't allow for moderation, doesn't apply to everyone:
Whereas AA teaches that alcoholism is a progressive disease that follows an inevitable trajectory, data from a federally funded survey called the National Epidemiological Survey on Alcohol and Related Conditions show that nearly one-fifth of those who have had alcohol dependence go on to drink at low-risk levels with no symptoms of abuse. And a recent survey of nearly 140,000 adults by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention found that nine out of 10 heavy drinkers are not dependent on alcohol and, with the help of a medical professional’s brief intervention, can change unhealthy habits.
We once thought about drinking problems in binary terms—you either had control or you didn’t; you were an alcoholic or you weren’t—but experts now describe a spectrum. An estimated 18 million Americans suffer from alcohol-use disorder, as the DSM-5, the latest edition of the American Psychiatric Association’s diagnostic manual, calls it. (The new term replaces the older alcohol abuse and the much more dated alcoholism, which has been out of favor with researchers for decades.) Only about 15 percent of those with alcohol-use disorder are at the severe end of the spectrum. The rest fall somewhere in the mild-to-moderate range, but they have been largely ignored by researchers and clinicians. Both groups—the hard-core abusers and the more moderate overdrinkers—need more-individualized treatment options.
AA doctrines are rooted in religious or puritanical hostility to alcohol, not critical thinking:
The American approach to treatment for drinking problems has roots in the country’s long-standing love-hate relationship with booze. The first settlers arrived with a great thirst for whiskey and hard cider, and in the early days of the republic, alcohol was one of the few beverages that was reliably safe from contamination. (It was also cheaper than coffee or tea.) The historian W. J. Rorabaugh has estimated that between the 1770s and 1830s, the average American over age 15 consumed at least five gallons of pure alcohol a year—the rough equivalent of three shots of hard liquor a day.
Religious fervor, aided by the introduction of public water-filtration systems, helped galvanize the temperance movement, which culminated in 1920 with Prohibition. That experiment ended after 14 years, but the drinking culture it fostered—secrecy and frenzied bingeing—persists.
In 1934, just after Prohibition’s repeal, a failed stockbroker named Bill Wilson staggered into a Manhattan hospital. Wilson was known to drink two quarts of whiskey a day, a habit he’d attempted to kick many times. He was given the hallucinogen belladonna, an experimental treatment for addictions, and from his hospital bed he called out to God to loosen alcohol’s grip. He reported seeing a flash of light and feeling a serenity he had never before experienced. He quit booze for good. The next year, he co-founded Alcoholics Anonymous. He based its principles on the beliefs of the evangelical Oxford Group, which taught that people were sinners who, through confession and God’s help, could right their paths.
AA is based on the idea that addiction as a sin that has taken control of our lives may not be based on science or critical thinking:
A public-relations specialist and early AA member named Marty Mann worked to disseminate the group’s main tenet: that alcoholics had an illness that rendered them powerless over booze. Their drinking was a disease, in other words, not a moral failing. Paradoxically, the prescription for this medical condition was a set of spiritual steps that required accepting a higher power, taking a “fearless moral inventory,” admitting “the exact nature of our wrongs,” and asking God to remove all character defects.
AA has not kept up with the science and biology of addiction:
Tom McLellan, a psychology professor at the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine who has served as a deputy U.S. drug czar and is an adviser to the World Health Organization, says that while AA and other programs that focus on behavioral change have value, they don’t address what we now know about the biology of drinking.
Alcohol acts on many parts of the brain, making it in some ways more complex than drugs like cocaine and heroin, which target just one area of the brain. Among other effects, alcohol increases the amount of gaba (gamma-aminobutyric acid), a chemical that slows down activity in the nervous system, and decreases the flow of glutamate, which activates the nervous system. (This is why drinking can make you relax, shed inhibitions, and forget your worries.) Alcohol also prompts the brain to release dopamine, a chemical associated with pleasure.
Over time, though, the brain of a heavy drinker adjusts to the steady flow of alcohol by producing less gaba and more glutamate, resulting in anxiety and irritability. Dopamine production also slows, and the person gets less pleasure out of everyday things. Combined, these changes gradually bring about a crucial shift: instead of drinking to feel good, the person ends up drinking to avoid feeling bad. Alcohol also damages the prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for judging risks and regulating behavior—one reason some people keep drinking even as they realize that the habit is destroying their lives. The good news is that the damage can be undone if they’re able to get their consumption under control.
Studies of twins and adopted children suggest that about half of a person’s vulnerability to alcohol-use disorder is hereditary, and that anxiety, depression, and environment—all considered “outside issues” by many in Alcoholics Anonymous and the rehab industry—also play a role. Still, science can’t yet fully explain why some heavy drinkers become physiologically dependent on alcohol and others don’t, or why some recover while others founder. We don’t know how much drinking it takes to cause major changes in the brain, or whether the brains of alcohol-dependent people are in some ways different from “normal” brains to begin with. What we do know, McLellan says, is that “the brains of the alcohol-addicted aren’t like those of the non-alcohol-dependent.”
Bill Wilson, AA’s founding father, was right when he insisted, 80 years ago, that alcohol dependence is an illness, not a moral failing. Why, then, do we so rarely treat it medically? It’s a question I’ve heard many times from researchers and clinicians. “Alcohol- and substance-use disorders are the realm of medicine,” McLellan says. “This is not the realm of priests.”
Overall Summary:
One. AA calls alcoholism a disease that controls its victim.
Two. AA calls on God as part of the cure.
Three. AA is all-or-nothing. One drink will result in a binge, so moderation is not an option.
Four. AA has no science to back its claims.
Five. AA claims a 75% success rate with no evidence; in fact, out of 48 addiction treatment methods, AA is ranked number 38, which puts it at the bottom.
Six. AA is not current with brain science research.
Overview of AA Critique
One. AA’s all-or-nothing approach made J.G. feel like a defeated misfit. In part, AA was alienating for J.G. because he had no faith in God when AA emphasizes surrendering to a Higher Power.
Two. One-way fallacy. AA told J.G. he had no other treatment options: “Either embrace AA or die.” It's AA or nothing.
J.G. eventually left AA and found effective treatment elsewhere.
Three. AA’s claims of success are less than other studies’ findings. Some claims for AA are as high as 75%.
However, Harvard’s Lance Dodes arrives at a success rate of 5-8%.
According to The Handbook of Alcoholism Treatment Approaches, AA is ranked 38 out of 48 methods.
Four. AA can't handle all the mental problems. Alcoholics suffer high rates of mental health problems. AA is not equipped to address these.
Five. AA truisms and wisdom have become culture’s sacred cow. You’re not allowed to criticize AA without being branded an insensitive lout who is “killing people” by discouraging them from joining AA.
This is an emotional, not a rational or critical thinking approach to disagreement.
Six. Rock-Bottom Theory is dangerous. The AA dogma that you must “hit rock bottom” before you really seek recovery is a dangerous message, according to many addiction treatment professionals. It would be like telling a 250-pound man to gain even more weight, soaring to 650 pounds, before he “got serious” about losing weight. By that time, he might be dead.
Seven. AA is criticized for it’s “one size fits all” approach, what is also called the Procrustean method.
Eight. AA offers either/or fallacy or false binary equations: Either you are an alcoholic or you are not. However, many addiction specialists claim that alcohol addiction exists on a spectrum.
Nine. AA can be a dangerous place for some. A lot of medical professionals force their patients to use AA at the exclusion of other treatments. Some AA environments are dangerous and abusive, especially toward women, according to a report in Pro Publica.
Ten. Finnish approach may be more effective and is based on science. Finland is effectively using United States neuroscientist John David Sinclair medical approach, which focuses on blocking dopamine during alcohol ingestion with the use of an opioid antagonist naltrexone.
Blocking dopamine in the brain through drugs is considered by many a scientifically proven treatment. In contrast, AA uses a non-scientific approach: You must undergo a spiritual makeover, come clean, be honest, makes amends with others, and experience a spiritual rebirth to stay away from addictive behavior. This belief is a sacred cow, but it’s not science.
In critical thinking, we must have credible evidence to support our claims. Is AA using credible evidence to support its claim that AA is the only way to treat addiction?
Counterarguments:
We all know family and friends who’d be dead if it weren’t for AA. They must be doing something right.
There is something to be said about changing one’s spiritual orientation, rather than using drugs, to free oneself from addictive behavior.
AA has a track record of providing a support group for people who can’t deal with their addiction on their own.
AA addresses the whole person, not just a habit, as we read in Ed Kressy's essay.
Rather than micromanaging this or that addiction with medication, AA attempts to change default settings of the soul and show how these default settings trigger addictive behavior.
For example, comedian Marc Maron has been off drugs and alcohol for close to 20 years with the help of AA recovery program. He says on his WTF podcast that recovery has taught him that growing up in a toxic family environment he built a default setting so that when he is in a healthy non-toxic work, friendship, or love relationship his default setting is to make that healthy environment toxic.
Why? Because, Marc Maron has learned, toxicity is his home.
For an another example, we can look to journalist Ana Marie Cox, who suffers from bipolar disorder and is a recovering alcoholic and prescription drug addict. AA recovery taught Ana Marie Cox that while she conquered drugs and alcohol, her default setting is to hate herself. As she said on her podcast With Friends Like These while talking to depressive NPR personality John Moe, her default setting is reach for the bottle of self-hatred.
For Ana Marie Cox, self-hatred is the one addiction she hasn't conquered. She said her default setting is "to reach for the bottle of self-hatred," a habit she's still trying to overcome.
What if we become dependent on the medication that is supposed to help us overcome our addiction?
Sample Thesis Statement That Supports Different Approaches Over AA:
While AA does a good job of addressing the holistic concerns to root out addictive behavior from addictive personalities, it should not be used as the Recovery of First Choice for all addicts since some people have specific needs that are more effectively treated with alternative methods.
Sample Introduction and Thesis
When you’re standing on a cliff and about to die from something extreme in your life such as morbid obesity and your doctor urges you to to get bariatric surgery, a dangerous procedure that involves tying your intestine in knots and stapling your gut shut, you look into the side effects: acid reflux, stomach aches, malnutrition, intestinal obstruction, vomiting. But you go through the procedure anyway because you’re desperate. On a scale of 0-10, your life on the Misery Scale is a 10. You’re an adult and you’ve never dated, you have no self-worth, you have diabetes 2, and your doctor says you could soon die. So you get the bariatric surgery, have your gut stapled shut, and now you’re less miserable. On the Miserable Scale, you’re down from a 10.0 to a 6.2.
Alcoholism has a certain parallel to the above. You’re going to die from your addiction. You can’t afford expensive treatment, but there are free AA meetings in the church basement around the block from your house. So you submit to the AA doctrines, some of which you don’t believe in. You compromise your critical thinking, embracing all the cliches and groupthink of your fellow AA members. You accept that AA is ranked low on the effectiveness scale, but you say to yourself, “It’s free, dude. Take what you can get in this world.” You’re now addicted to AA meetings and have to engage in a bunch of annoying “recovery speak” with fellow addicts, but here’s the thing. On the Misery Scale, you’ve gone from a 10.0 down to a 6.2. Yeah, AA sucks. Having to hang out with other addicts sucks. Having to quit all alcohol when the possibility of moderate drinking might be a better option sucks. But you know what. Sometimes in life you take what you can get. Sometimes in life, you trade Misery 10.0 for Misery 6.2.
Thesis That Disagrees with the Above
To surrender to a cult absent of science and larded with the kind of groupthink and cliches that are so notorious as AA because one is allegedly trading in Misery 10.0 for Misery 6.2 is a colossal logical fallacy that collapses under close inspection. The writer has no guarantee that our misery will decline from 10.0 to 6.2. The writer does not acknowledge equally affordable treatments that may be more effective, and finally, the writer's entire argument is infected with an irrational pessimism that would have us believe that life is a bargaining table in which we negotiate one kind of misery for another. The writer's worldview is so bleak as to be unworthy of serious consideration.
Sample Thesis That Favors Medication Over AA In Some Cases
While I feel badly for the Marc Marons and Ana Marie Coxes of the world who need AA to help them overcome their toxic, self-destructive behavior, we must acknowledge that for some with a specific chemical problem and no toxic personality afflictions the Finnish medical intervention program is probably the most effective treatment.
Sample Thesis That Defends AA:
While there are addiction treatments that can help change people's chemistry to free them from their addiction, AA is the best method available because it changes the total person, not just a person's chemistry, and it is this complete transformation that makes for a better long-term way to fight what will be a lifetime of addictive behaviors.
Sample Thesis That Defends AA:
We are better off relying on AA's method of attacking the dysfunctional personality that creates addictive behavior than become dependent on medications that simply become a new addiction.
Sample Outline for Addiction Essay
Paragraph 1: Summarize the major points of the essay "The Irrationality of AA."
Paragraph 2: Develop a thesis that agrees or disagrees with the above essay.
Paragraphs 3-6: Your supporting paragraphs
Paragraph 7: Counterargument-rebuttal
Paragraph 8: Conclusion
Sources
Addiction is not a disease" reviewed by Laura Miller
"Is Addiction a Habit or a Disease?" by Zachary Siegel
"Addiction is a Disease and Needs to be Treated as Such"by David Sack.
Essays of Note:
The Science of Choice in Addiction
The Irrationality of Alcoholics Anonymous
Essay Option E Regarding Electric Scooters:
Write an argumentative essay that addresses the viability of electric scooters as a thriving business model for alternative modes of transportation. Consider the advances in technology, the share economy, and the benefits of regulations measured against sidewalk traffic and legal liability.
Vox explains electric scooters.
As of September 2018, Los Angeles has a temporary program to help promote electric scooters, as reported in LA Times.
See example of electric scooter defense that uses refutation method.
Background
When the car was first invented, many people died because we didn't know anything about safety, road infrastructure, insurance, liability, driving training, etc.
As a result, people railed against the automobile as the scourge against society.
Enter electric scooters, especially in crowded areas of San Francisco and Santa Monica where people are navigating through crowded streets going close to 20 miles per hour on an electric scooter. It doesn't take a genius to anticipate a lot of crashes and angry people.
Arguments for Allowing Electric Scooters to Becoming a Thriving Business
One. They are convenient.
Two. They are eco-friendly.
Three. They are affordable, costing on average $3 per ride.
Four. They are popular and have proven to be in big demand.
Five. Safety education can be sent to users on their smartphones.
Six. Cars started out on rocky ground with safety concerns but those concerns were addressed over time.
Seven. You can't stop technology just because you're scared of new things.
Eight. Speed limits, such as lowering max speed from 15 to 12 MPH, can be imposed.
Nine. They are easy to use.
Ten. They eliminate parking hassles.
Arguments Against Electric Scooters
One. Sending safety instruction on a smartphone device is inadequate.
Two. It will be difficult to force helmet compliance.
Three. It will be impossible to ticket all offenders as police can't monitor citizen irresponsibility on such a large scale.
Four. Electric scooters are another example of "tech arrogance" in which greedy techies imposed rushed adoptions on public without adequate testing and due diligence.
Five. People abuse the scooters so that many don't work safely or are not sanitary for use.
Six. They are one lawsuit away from extinction (but not true of cars).
Seven. "Government holds purse strings for infrastructure."
Eight. Competing communities will attend town hall meetings to give their government representatives mixed signals. For example, Venice and Santa Monica homeowners who live near the scooter congestion will be opposed to scooters and people who need scooters to commute to work will want them.
Scooters: What You Need to Know: The Ringer
Wired electric scooters liability
Avoiding Comma Splices
To avoid comma splices, you need to know the difference between punctuating two sentences with a conjunctive adverb and two sentences with a FANBOYS (coordinating conjunction).
A comma splice is joining two sentences with a comma when you should separate them with a period or a semicolon.
To Avoid Comma Splices, Know the Difference Between Coordinating Conjunctions (FANBOYS) and Conjunctive Adverbs
Additionally
Besides
Therefore
However
Instead
To the contrary
In contrast
Similarly
In addition
Thus
Hence
Subsequently
As far as we can tell
To be on point
Moreover
Nonetheless
Nevertheless
Anyway
To put it bluntly
If I may be so bold
If you will allow me to interject
Otherwise
Finally
To be sure
Indeed
FANBOYS: for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so
I don't eat sugar, for sugar elevates insulin, which elevates appetite.
I don't eat sugar because sugar elevates insulin, which elevates appetite. (because is subordinating conjunction)
For a cheat meal, I will typically eat a lavish seven-course Thai feast followed by several slices of berry pie larded with vanilla ice cream, yet I will avoid alcohol.
For a cheat meal, I will typically eat a lavish seven-course Thai feast with various manifestations of spicy curry followed by several slices of berry pie larded with vanilla ice cream. However, I will avoid alcohol.
However is one of many conjunctive adverbs that too often are misused to create a comma splice:
Wrong
I avoid alcohol, however, once a week I may sip some of my wife's red wine.
Two Correct Sentences
I avoid alcohol; however, once a week I may sip some of my wife's red wine.
I avoid alcohol. However, once a week I may sip some of my wife's red wine.
Wrong
I decided not to get the Accord Sport 1.5 Turbo, instead, I got the 2.0.
Correct
I decided not to get the Accord Sport 1.5 Turbo. Instead, I got the 2.0.
Examples of Comma Splices
Incorrect
People love Facebook, however, they don't realize Facebook is sucking all of their energy.
Corrected
People love Facebook. However, they don't realize Facebook is sucking all of their energy.
Corrected
Though people love Facebook, they fail to realize Facebook is sucking all their energy.
Incorrect
Patience is difficult to cultivate, it grows steadily only if we make it a priority.
Corrected
Patience is difficult to cultivate. It grows steadily only if we make it a priority.
Corrected
Because patience grows within us so slowly, patience is extremely difficult to cultivate.
You can use a comma between two complete sentences when you join them with a FANBOYS word or coordinating conjunction (for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so).
Correct
People love Facebook, but they don't realize Facebook is sucking all of their energy.
From Writing Center, University of North Carolina:
2. FANBOYS
FANBOYS is a handy mnemonic device for remembering the coordinating conjunctions: For, And, Nor, But, Or, Yet, So. These words function as connectors. They can connect words, phrases, and clauses, like this:
Words: I am almost dressed and ready.
Phrases: My socks are in the living room or under my bed.
Clauses: They smell really bad, so they will be easy to find.
Notice the comma in the final example. You should always have a comma before FANBOYS that join two independent clauses (two subjects and two verbs that make up two complete thoughts). Look carefully at the next two sentences to see two independent clauses separated by comma + FANBOYS.
If you do not have two subjects and two verbs separated by the FANBOYS, you do not need to insert the comma before the FANBOYS. In other words, if the second grouping of words isn’t a complete thought, don’t use a comma. Try reading the words after FANBOYS all by themselves. Do they make a complete thought?
You can read your own writing in the same way. Read what comes after FANBOYS all by itself. If it’s a complete thought, you need a comma. If not, you don’t.
3. The dreaded comma splice
If you don’t have FANBOYS between the two complete and separate thoughts, using a comma alone causes a “comma splice” or “fused sentence” (some instructors may call it a run-on). Some readers (especially professors) will think of this as a serious error.
- BAD: My hamster loved to play, I gave him a hula-hoop.
- ALSO BAD: You wore a lovely hat, it was your only defense.
To fix these comma splices, you can do one of four simple things: just add FANBOYS, change the comma to a semicolon, make each clause a separate sentence, or add a subordinator (a word like because, while, although, if, when, since, etc.)
- GOOD: You wore a lovely hat, for it was your only defense.
- ALSO GOOD: You wore a lovely hat; it was your only defense.
- STILL GOOD: You wore a lovely hat. It was your only defense.
- TOTALLY GOOD: You wore a lovely hat because it was your only defense.
4. FANBOYS fakers
However, therefore, moreover, and other words like them are not FANBOYS (they are called conjunctive adverbs). They go between two complete thoughts, just like FANBOYS, but they take different punctuation. Why? Who cares? You just need to recognize that they are not FANBOYS (for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so—remember?), and you’ll make the right choice.
When you want to use one of these words, you have two good choices. Check to see if you have a complete thought on both sides of the “conjunctive adverb.” If you do, then you can use a period to make two sentences, or you can use a semicolon after the first complete thought. Either way, you’ll use a comma after the faker in the second complete thought. Notice the subtle differences in punctuation here:
- GOOD: Basketball is my favorite sport. However, table tennis is where I excel.
- ALSO GOOD: Basketball is my favorite sport; however, table tennis is where I excel.
- BAD: Basketball is my favorite sport, however table tennis is where I excel.
- ALSO BAD: Basketball is my favorite sport, however, table tennis is where I excel.
Examples
Jerry ate ten pizzas a week. Nonetheless, he remained skinny.
Jerry ate ten pizzas a week, but he remained skinny.
Barbara didn't buy the BMW. Instead, she bought the Acura.
Barbara didn't buy the BMW, yet she did buy the Acura.
Steve wasn't interested in college. Moreover, he didn't want to work full-time.
Steve wasn't interested in college, and he didn't want to work full-time.
I don't want you to pay me back the hundred dollars you owe me. However, I do want you to help me do my taxes.
I don't want you to pay me back the hundred dollars you owe me, but I do want you to help me do my taxes.
I don't want you to pay me back the hundred dollars you owe me, but I do, however, want you to help me do my taxes.
I feel that our relationship has become stale, stagnant, and turgid. Consequently, I think we should break up.
I feel that our relationship has become stale, stagnant, and turgid, so I think we should break up.
Students hate reading. Therefore, they must be tested with closed-book reading exams.
Students hate reading, so they must be tested with closed-book reading exams.
Avoiding Comma Splices and Run-Ons
Fused (run-on) sentence
Klee's paintings seem simple, they are very sophisticated.
She doubted the value of medication she decided to try it once.
A fused sentence (also called a run-on) joins clauses that could each stand alone as a sentence with no punctuation or words to link them. Fused sentences must be either divided into separate sentences or joined by adding words or punctuation.
Comma Splice
I was strongly attracted to her, she was beautiful and funny.
We hated the meat loaf, the cafeteria served it every Friday.
A comma splice occurs when only a comma separates clauses that could each stand alone as a sentence. To correct a comma splice, you can insert a semicolon or period, connect the clauses with a word such as and or because, or restructure the sentence.
After each sentence, put a “C” for Correct or a “CS” for Comma Splice. If the sentence is a comma splice, rewrite it so that it is correct.
One. Bailey used to eat ten pizzas a day, now he eats a spinach salad for lunch and dinner.
Two. Marco no longer runs on the treadmill, instead he opts for the less injury-causing elliptical trainer.
Three. Running can cause shin splints, which can cause excruciating pain.
Four. Running in the incorrect form can wreak havoc on the knees, slowing down can often correct the problem.
Five. While we live in a society where 1,500-calorie cheeseburgers are on the rise, the reading of books, sad to say, is on the decline.
Six. Facebook is a haven for narcissists, it encourages showing off with selfies and other mundane activities that are ways of showing how great and amazing our lives our, what a sham.
Seven. We live in a society where more and more Americans are consuming 1,500-calorie cheeseburgers, however, those same Americans are reading less and less books.
Eight. Love is a virus from outer space, it tends to become most contagious during April and May.
Nine. The tarantula causes horror in many people, moreover there is a species of tarantula in Brazil, the wandering banana spider, that is the most venomous spider in the world.
Ten. Even though spiders cause many people to recoil with horror, most species are harmless.
Eleven. The high repair costs of European luxury vehicles repelled Amanda from buying such a car, instead she opted for a Japanese-made Lexus.
Twelve. Amanda got a job at the Lexus dealership, now she’s trying to get me a job in the same office.
Thirteen. While consuming several cinnamon buns, a twelve-egg cheese omelet, ten slices of French toast slathered in maple syrup, and a tray of Swedish loganberry crepes topped with a dollop of blueberry jam, I contemplated the very grave possibility that I might be eating my way to a heart attack.
Fourteen. Even though I rank marijuana far less dangerous than most pharmaceutical drugs, alcohol, and other commonly used intoxicants, I find marijuana unappealing for a host of reasons, not the least of which is its potential for radically degrading brain cells, its enormous effect on stimulating the appetite, resulting in obesity, and its capacity for over-relaxing many people so that they lose significant motivation to achieve their primary goals, opting instead for a life of sloth and intractable indolence.
Agreement / Addition / Similarity
The transition words like also, in addition, and, likewise, add information, reinforce ideas, and express agreement with preceding material.
in the first place
not only ... but also
as a matter of fact
in like manner
in addition
coupled with
in the same fashion / way
first, second, third
in the light of
not to mention
to say nothing of
equally important
by the same token
again
to
and
also
then
equally
identically
uniquely
like
as
too
moreover
as well as
together with
of course
likewise
comparatively
correspondingly
similarly
furthermore
additionally
Opposition / Limitation / Contradiction
Transition phrases like but, rather and or, express that there is evidence to the contrary or point out alternatives, and thus introduce a change the line of reasoning (contrast).
although this may be true
in contrast
different from
of course ..., but
on the other hand
on the contrary
at the same time
in spite of
even so / though
be that as it may
then again
above all
in reality
after all
but
(and) still
unlike
or
(and) yet
while
albeit
besides
as much as
even though
although
instead
whereas
despite
conversely
otherwise
however
rather
nevertheless
nonetheless
regardless
notwithstanding
Cause / Condition / Purpose
These transitional phrases present specific conditions or intentions.
in the event that
granted (that)
as / so long as
on (the) condition (that)
for the purpose of
with this intention
with this in mind
in the hope that
to the end that
for fear that
in order to
seeing / being that
in view of
If
... then
unless
when
whenever
while
because of
as
since
while
lest
in case
provided that
given that
only / even if
so that
so as to
owing to
inasmuch as
due to
Examples / Support / Emphasis
These transitional devices (like especially) are used to introduce examples as support, to indicate importance or as an illustration so that an idea is cued to the reader.
in other words
to put it differently
for one thing
as an illustration
in this case
for this reason
to put it another way
that is to say
with attention to
by all means
important to realize
another key point
first thing to remember
most compelling evidence
must be remembered
point often overlooked
to point out
on the positive side
on the negative side
with this in mind
notably
including
like
to be sure
namely
chiefly
truly
indeed
certainly
surely
markedly
such as
especially
explicitly
specifically
expressly
surprisingly
frequently
significantly
particularly
in fact
in general
in particular
in detail
for example
for instance
to demonstrate
to emphasize
to repeat
to clarify
to explain
to enumerate
Effect / Consequence / Result
Some of these transition words (thus, then, accordingly, consequently, therefore, henceforth) are time words that are used to show that after a particular time there was a consequence or an effect.
Note that for and because are placed before the cause/reason. The other devices are placed before the consequences or effects.
as a result
under those circumstances
in that case
for this reason
in effect
for
thus
because the
then
hence
consequently
therefore
thereupon
forthwith
accordingly
henceforth
Conclusion / Summary / Restatement
These transition words and phrases conclude, summarize and / or restate ideas, or indicate a final general statement. Also, some words (like therefore) from the Effect / Consequence category can be used to summarize.
as can be seen
generally speaking
in the final analysis
all things considered
as shown above
in the long run
given these points
as has been noted
in a word
for the most part
after all
in fact
in summary
in conclusion
in short
in brief
in essence
to summarize
on balance
altogether
overall
ordinarily
usually
by and large
to sum up
on the whole
in any event
in either case
all in all
Obviously
Ultimately
Definitely
Time / Chronology / Sequence
These transitional words (like finally) have the function of limiting, restricting, and defining time. They can be used either alone or as part of adverbial expressions.
at the present time
from time to time
sooner or later
at the same time
up to the present time
to begin with
in due time
as soon as
as long as
in the meantime
in a moment
without delay
in the first place
all of a sudden
at this instant
first, second
immediately
quickly
finally
after
later
last
until
till
since
then
before
hence
since
when
once
about
next
now
formerly
suddenly
shortly
henceforth
whenever
eventually
meanwhile
further
during
in time
prior to
forthwith
straightaway
by the time
whenever
until now
now that
instantly
presently
occasionally
Many transition words in the time category (consequently; first, second, third; further; hence; henceforth; since; then, when; and whenever) have other uses.
Except for the numbers (first, second, third) and further they add a meaning of time in expressing conditions, qualifications, or reasons. The numbers are also used to add information or list examples. Further is also used to indicate added space as well as added time.
Space / Location / Place
These transition words are often used as part of adverbial expressions and have the function to restrict, limit or qualify space. Quite a few of these are also found in the Time category and can be used to describe spatial order or spatial reference.
in the middle
to the left/right
in front of
on this side
in the distance
here and there
in the foreground
in the background
in the center of
adjacent to
opposite to
here
there
next
where
from
over
near
above
below
down
up
under
further
beyond
nearby
wherever
around
between
before
alongside
amid
among
beneath
beside
behind
across
Example of an Essay That Never Uses First, Second, Third, Fourth, Etc., for Transitions, But Relies on "Paragraph Links"
Stupid Reasons for Getting Married
People should get married because they are ready to do so, meaning they're mature and truly love one another, and most importantly are prepared to make the compromises and sacrifices a healthy marriage entails. However, most people get married for the wrong reasons, that is, for stupid, lame, and asinine reasons.
Alas, needy narcissists, hardly candidates for successful marriage, glom onto the most disastrous reasons for getting married and those reasons make it certain that their marriage will quickly terminate or waddle precariously along in an interminable domestic hell.
A common and compelling reason that fuels the needy into a misguided marriage is when these fragmented souls see that everyone their age has already married—their friends, brothers, sisters, and, yes, even their enemies. Overcome by what is known today as "FOMO," they feel compelled to “get with the program" so that they may not miss out on the lavish gifts bestowed upon bride and groom. Thus, the needy are rankled by envy and greed and allow their base impulses to be the driving motivation behind their marriage.
When greed is not impelling them to tie the knot, they are also chafed by a sense of being short-changed when they see their recently-married dunce of a co-worker promoted above them for presumably the added credibility that marriage afforded them. As singles, they know they will never be taken seriously at work.
If it's not a lame stab at credibility that's motivating them to get married, it's the fear that they as the years tick by they are becoming less and less attractive and their looks will no longer obscure their woeful character deficiencies as age scrunches them up into little pinch-faced, leathery imps.
A more egregious reason for marrying is to end the tormented, off-on again-off-on again relationship, which needs the official imprimatur of marriage, followed by divorce, to officially terminate the relationship. I spoke to a marriage counselor once who told me that some couples were so desperate to break-up for good that they actually got married, then divorced, for this purpose.
Other pathological reasons to marry are to find a loathsome spouse in order to spite one’s parents or to set a wedding date in order to hire a personal trainer and finally lose those thirty pounds one has been carrying for too long.
Envy, avarice, spite, and vanity fuel both needy men and women alike. However, there is a certain type of needy man, whom we'll call the Man-Child, who finds that it is easier to marry his girlfriend than it is to have to listen to her constant nagging about their need to get married. His girlfriend’s constant harping about the fact their relationship hasn’t taken the “next logical step” presents a burden so great that marriage in comparison seems benign. Even if the Man-Child has not developed the maturity to marry, even if he isn’t sure if he’s truly in love, even if he is still inextricably linked to some former girlfriend that his current girlfriend does not know about, even if he knows in his heart of hearts that he is not hard-wired for marriage, even if he harbors a secret defect that renders him a liability to any woman, he will dismiss all of these factors and rush into a marriage in order to alleviate his current source of anxiety and suffering, which is the incessant barrage of his girlfriend’s grievances about them not being married.
Indeed, some of needy man’s worst decisions have been made in order to quell a discontented woman. The Man-Child's eagerness to quiet a woman’s discontent points to a larger defect, namely, his spinelessness, which, if left unchecked, turns him into the Go-With-the-Flow-Guy. As the name suggests, this type of man offers no resistance, even in large-scale decisions that affect his destiny. Put this man in a situation where his girlfriend, his friends, and his family are all telling him that “it’s time to get married,” and he will, as his name suggests, simply “go with the flow.” He will allow everyone else to make the wedding plans, he’ll let someone fit him for a wedding suit, he’ll allow his mother to pick out the ring, he’ll allow his fiancé to pick out the look and flavor of the wedding cake and then on the day of the wedding, he simply “shows up” with all the passion of a turnip.
The Man-Child's turnip-like passivity and his aversion to argument ensure marital longevity. However, there are drawbacks. Most notably, he will over time become so silent that his wife won’t even be able to get a word out of him. Over the course of their fifty-year marriage, he’ll go with her to restaurants with a newspaper and read it, ignoring her. His impassivity is so great that she could tell him about the “other man” she is seeing and he wouldn’t blink an eye. At home he is equally reticent, watching TV or reading with an inexpressive, dull-eyed demeanor suggestive of a half-dead lizard.
Whatever this reptilian man lacks as a social animal is made up by the fact that he is docile and is therefore non-threatening, a condition that everyone, including his wife, prefers to the passionate male beast whose strong, irreverent opinions will invariably rock the boat and deem that individual a troublemaker. The Go-With-the-Flow-Guy, on the other hand, is reliably safe and as such makes for controlling women a very good catch in spite of his tendency to be as charismatic and flavorful as a cardboard wafer.
A desperate marriage motivation exclusively owned by needy, immature men is the belief that since they have pissed off just about every other woman on the planet, they need to find refuge by marrying the only woman whom they haven’t yet thoroughly alienated—their current girlfriend. According to sportswriter Rick Reilly, baseball slugger Barry Bonds’ short-lived reality show was a disgrace in part because for Reilly the reality show is “the last bastion of the scoundrel.” Likewise, for many men who have offended over 99% of the female race with their pestilent existence, marriage is the last sanctuary for the despised male who has stepped on so many women’s toes that he is, understandably, a marked man.
Therefore, these men aren’t so much getting married as much as they are enlisting in a “witness protection program.” They are after all despised and targeted by their past female enemies for all their lies and betrayals and running out of allies they see that marriage makes a good cover as they try to blend in with mainstream society and take on a role that is antithetical to their single days as lying, predatory scoundrels.
The analogy between marriage and a witness protection program is further developed when we see that for many men marriage is their final stab at earning public respectability because they are, as married men, proclaiming to the world that they have voluntarily shackled themselves with the chains of domesticity in order that they may be spared greater punishments, the bulk of which will be exacted upon by the women whom they used and manipulated for so many years.
Because it is assumed that their wives will keep them in check, their wives become, in a way, equivalent to the ankle bracelet transmitters worn by parolees who are only allowed to travel within certain parameters. Marriage anchors man close to the home and, combined with the wife’s reliable issuing of house chores and other domestic duties, the shackled man is rendered safely tethered to his “home base” where his wife can observe him sharply to make sure he doesn’t backslide into the abhorrent behavior of his past single life.
Many men will see the above analysis of marriage as proof that their fear of marriage as a prison was right all along, but what they should learn from the analogy between marriage and prison is that they are more productive, more socialized, more softened around his hard edges, and more protected, both from the outside world and from themselves by being shackled to their domestic duties. With these improvements in their lives, they have actually, within limits, attained a freedom they could never find in single life.
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